[Princelee202]

Hi Bud, i am wondering if everything is okay with you. How are you getting on?

[Princelee202]

Hi bud, sorry i did not respond to you yesterday, i had a very long day. YES, all is fine on my side. Yesterday, i attended an event that got me in a very close proximity with a casino i have frequented. In the past, i would have stolen some time from the event to go try my hand at the tables. I would convince myself that i will try just a few thousands for fun, but that will quickly turn to “a lot of thousands”. Yesterday was very different, i had no urge to leave the event to visit the casino and i stayed in this event venue for so many hours. I could very well see the people going in and out of the casino from where i sat and after watching for hours, i made a very curious observation. I noticed the people walking into the casino were going in with alacrity, smiles on their faces and brisk walk. When they left, they left with dejection, they walked more slowly and you can clearly see the sadness in a lot of faces. This reminded me very well of myself, the joy and hope of placing a bet and the sadness and regret that quickly follows with the realisation that i just lost “again”. I felt sad for the people, i felt a deep sadness for them. I understood very well what they are going through and how little control they have of their inhibitions. I never want to lose control again.
Today i will receive my pay. I earn a decent amount and it is more than i need to cover my monthly bills. I have contacted some of my creditors and committed to making some payment toward my debts later today. Once i receive my pay, I plan to honour all these commitments and pay my bills. I will only be left with enough till the next pay, so even with the urge to place a bet, i will have nothing to place. If i can make it to the next pay without placing a bet or going to the casino, i believe my journey to recovery will have started.

[Princelee202]

Hi bud, sorry i did not respond to you yesterday, i had a very long day. YES, all is fine on my side. Yesterday, i attended an event that got me in a very close proximity with a casino i have frequented. In the past, i would have stolen some time from the event to go try my hand at the tables. I would convince myself that i will try just a few thousands for fun, but that will quickly turn to “a lot of thousands”. Yesterday was very different, i had no urge to leave the event to visit the casino and i stayed in this event venue for so many hours. I could very well see the people going in and out of the casino from where i sat and after watching for hours, i made a very curious observation. I noticed the people walking into the casino were going in with alacrity, smiles on their faces and brisk walk. When they left, they left with dejection, they walked more slowly and you can clearly see the sadness in a lot of faces. This reminded me very well of myself, the joy and hope of placing a bet and the sadness and regret that quickly follows with the realisation that i just lost “again”. I felt sad for the people, i felt a deep sadness for them. I understood very well what they are going through and how little control they have of their inhibitions. I never want to lose control again.
Today i will receive my pay. I earn a decent amount and it is more than i need to cover my monthly bills. I have contacted some of my creditors and committed to making some payment toward my debts later today. Once i receive my pay, I plan to honour all these commitments and pay my bills. I will only be left with enough till the next pay, so even with the urge to place a bet, i will have nothing to place. If i can make it to the next pay without placing a bet or going to the casino, i believe my journey to recovery will have started.

[Princelee202]

It feels very good to have someone else to talk to about this. I am surprised how much stronger and resolved that I feel since writing the first words here. We have addictive personalities and that is why we have been caught in this web. We alone can break the circle, break away from this rat race. It will be a long battle and I will be looking forward to winning and hopefully together.

[Princelee202]

It is a pleasure to meet you.

I have never attended G.A meetings and I am not the best person to advise on this. Whatever you do decide to do, the solution is “you”. It is good to have like-minded people here who totally understands the disease and the addiction. I think it is important to keep this resolve and to always be on guard. There are traps everywhere and one bet can quickly become 100 and then a thousand. It is a terrible feeling to forget the value of money. To only remember the value after you have lost it. While we gamble, we miss out on the good things in life, we are always chasing something, a big win, a loss or something else. Time to take back control with action.

[Princelee202]

Isn’t it funny how they stop being nice to you once you want to close your account. When you have your account open with them, they are happy to service your account and take your bets. They smile and assist you with enthusiasm until you decide to end your relationship with them. It was smart of you to take the matter to the NLRC. When your pay comes, every day you do not place a bet is money saved. It is easy to see the results and think “I could have won if I placed a bet”, but that is the trap, that is the lie. It is fear of not placing a winning bet that pushes us to place loosing ones. I have decided to hold on to this pain of the most recent loss. I never want to feel this way ever again and I will make sure that I don’t. Stay strong and determined, your hard earned money deserves better, you deserve to spend it on yourself and not give it away for adrenaline. It’s a scam, a promise that would never be fulfilled, dreams of millions in exchange for your real millions. We are awake now buddy, let’s not fall asleep again.

[Princelee202]

Hi, am glad to meet you here. I am totally ready for the journey. I have made a few adjustments today already to start my journey. I closed the accounts and luckily i am also able to ban myself in the Casino’s in South Africa. I have started this process and will see it through in a couple of days. I will receive my salary in two days time and i have made solid arrangements to make sure i will not have anything to spare to gambling. I will go same day and pay all my dues and then buy all essentials. Whatever is left, i will buy gift cards for future purchases (it is a tip i found here). Unfortunately for you, i know things are a but different in Nigeria. However, i believe you can find ways. Just do not give away another single cent of your hard earned money.

[Princelee202]

Hi, thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. It is such a huge relief to be able to let out the pain and disappointment I feel inside. It is sad to have so many people suffering the same thing but it also gives hope that there is a light somewhere at the end of this very long and very dark tunnel. I woke up today even more determined to rid myself of this bug and fix this glitch. It has swallowed my whole soul, mind and mental health but I refuse to give it any more power. It is time for me to get some huge wins and I have realised that the win I need will not be with a bet but with self-control and finally putting my money to good and proper use. I feel happier today than I have felt in the last few years because I strongly believe in myself now and my new found determination will be my drive. I hope you also win in your battle. I have declared war on my gambling addiction and every day without placing a bet or visiting the casino will be a battle won. I will devise strategies and I will fight it head-on with a daily reminder of what gambling has cost me. It is a winnable battle.

[Princelee202]

I just had a thought to write down one of my numerous humiliating gambling experience. There has been so many but this is the one that comes to mind more often;

I planned a Christmas holiday for i and my bf in 2017. I wanted really to give him a fantastic holiday as we have had a rough year as a result of my reckless management of money. He believed i had been carrying my family financially and that is why i have had a bad year but the truth was my gambling problem caused all my problems that year. I stopped gambling and saved up enough for the holidays. I planned it and paid for the accommodation and a few activities. When we got to the city, we were very happy and excited about the next few days. I booked our accommodation for 2 weeks and had a lot of exciting activities ahead of us. 3 days into the holiday, i discovered a casino very close to our accommodation. The prospect of gambling in a new casino, in a new city was overwhelming and i couldn’t resist. I lied to my bf that i had to drive out to buy some food and refill the car since we will be making a long drive the following day to a tourism site. I started off betting low and then high. I lost 100% all the money budgeted for the holiday and only had a small amount of saving left. The money left was still enough to see us through the holiday if we managed. I left that day and next day i was back with the savings when we returned from our drive. I lost all the savings that evening .

I had to cut short the holiday after only 5 days and lied about my mother being sick and in need of urgent attention. We had to drive back 6 hours on Christmas day. It was a very painful and humiliating experience for me. I swore that day that i would stop and i would never put myself in that situation again but i have done so many more times..again…and again….and again….

[Princelee202]

Hi, i have read through your story and i can really relate to your situation. I was addicted to the slot machines and i soon moved on to the tables and online betting which is where i am right now. Today i discovered this site while searching for help so i really do not have much to offer you at this time but only encouragement. I believe it is possible to STOP and regain control. I have decided to do the same. Today i lost so much to online gambling and it is a turning point for me. I have closed the account and i am determined to burn myself in all the casino’s i visit. I am determined to focus on my life and start attending my debts instead of waiting for the big pay that will take care of everything. I haven’t been here long but i have picked up on one thing “Gambling is not the solution but the problem”. I am holding on to this thought as it resonates very deeply with me. Most (if not all) of the problems and debts i have right now are as a result of gambling so further gambling will not solve them but further escalate them. I know it will not be an easy journey but the stories of the people here has given me a renewed hope and believe that i can do it. I hope it does the same for you.

Kelvin

[Princelee202]

Hi, i totally understand how you feel. I am also from Nigeria although i have stayed in South Africa for the past few years. I mention this because i understand the hesitation to hand over your finances to a relative or a close friend. I also know that the brooks do not have self exclusion options available. I really understand your situation.

I found this site just about 3 hours ago while researching for help. I have just lost about $11, 000 and that is almost 4mil Naira to sports bet over this weekend. I was chasing my loss of $4000+ from last weekend. It is 2:30 AM here and i can’t find sleep. I have been up thinking of all the things i could have done with that money. I am hating myself, loathing the lack of control that gets me to keep funding my bet accounts. I gamble at the casino’s and also online. I sometimes place sports bets and then go to the casino to try and win back my sports bet before i even get the results. I end up loosing both ways.

I do not know the first thing about recovery and i am hoping tonight will be the start of my own personal journey. I do not have any tips for you and i am sure there are people here who will be better qualified to help and advise you. All i can tell you is that “you are not alone”. This is an illness and i believe you have taken a huge step by seeking for help.

I will like to know how it goes when you get your salary in. I will try and follow your struggles as closely as i can while still working on my own problems. If i find any helpful tips, i will be sure to pass them on.

Stay Strong

Kelvin

[Author]

Posts