[lizbeth4]

Laura, Your post made me think. I’m always impatient and hard on myself! I’m doing my best and I need to be patient as it will take time to pay off my debts. I also have many things to be grateful for. My positives outweigh my negatives. I do need to live in the now, the moment! I’ve struck up a friendship with my 80 year old neighbor, who recently lost her Son. She doesn’t drive. Her youngest Son lives with her but works full time. We went to the thrift shop and had lunch at the local pizza place. I found DVD movies for $1 and a brand new rice/pasta/vegetable steamer for $4. She is a very interesting person. I thought about introducing her to my Mother as they are the same age but my Mother is very anti social, so it’s probably not a good idea. I am taking my Mother to a new restaurant this Thursday. She seems excited. Hoping to have my basic jewelry start up supplies ordered by this weekend. I’m keeping busy and gamble free!

[lizbeth4]

Even though I’m paying down the debt, it feels like it’s taking so long. It sure didn’t take long to incur! I feel like im on tract with a small cushion then there’s car tags, maintenance, yearly HOA fees, ect… I know that I have to look at the big picture and the end goal. I have a lot to be grateful for: my children are in a good place and are parenting my Grandchildren well, I’m healthy and In a good place. Making jewerly will be therapeutic for me and if it takes off even the better. I can be so cynical sometimes. I need to keep looking at the positives.

[lizbeth4]

My Sister’s stay was short because she has to work tomorrow (Memorial day). We had fun and a great dinner out last night. I’m looking forward to ordering some jewelry supplies this week. I’m getting the minimum to start with because the start up is costly. I can add on as I have extra money. The ideas I have are endless. Can’t wait to get started!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Laura for your post. I was only too happy to help my Sister. I received my tax refund and it went to the 2 bills that I had allotted it for. More debt paid down! I have some money left for a nice dinner when my Sister is here this weekend and money to start buying jelwery making supplies. Exciting! Things are falling into place. Life is good!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Monica, I’m glad that your job is going well. You sound positive and motivated. I’m sure you will be relieved to find out what is going on with your stomach. A holiday with your Daughter sounds lovely. Keep doing what you’re doing.

[lizbeth4]

PS: The highlight of my day was my youngest Daughter sending pics of my Granddaughter and my Grandson calling me. He is spending 1 week with me this summer. Happiness!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Laura for your supportive post. My refund will go for the final payment on my property taxes and my HOA fees for the year. I’m finding that I’m being more patient and understanding with my Mother. It’s hard to see her struggle with her words, ect. She’s getting so fragile. I had a stressful day. My Sister called and asked for a favor concerning her youngest adult Son. My Sister never asks for help. I was able to help but had a lot of running around to do but accomplished her request. She was so grateful. I’m mentally drained. But the stress didn’t trigger gambling thoughts.

[lizbeth4]

Today was a busy day! I did yard work, tended the garden. I sold some baby clothing and shoes she has outgrown. I sold a few of my items that were new with price tags as I waited too long to return and they didn’t fit properly. I briefly thought about gambling today but I refrained! I had lunch with my Mother and we played some games. My Sister is coming again for a visit this weekend. We’re planning on going to some yard sales and taking Mom to breakfast. Fun!!! Tomorrow will be spent painting the trim on the back of the house. I’ve marked off 2 home projects I’ve completed. I have many more! Keeps me busy and out of trouble.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post. I’m so happy that your life is going in a positive direction. You so deserve it! I’m cleaning and reorganizing my storage/workshop room. OMG! I’m crossing off items needed for my home projects as I have come across many items I didn’t know I had that were shoved back on the shelves. More money saved! I came across some old metal pieces and my mind went to what I could make out of them. I have some unique, cool ideas. I text my youngest Daughter last night and asked her if she needed any money. She said no as she is working and just received her tax refund. She wants to make it on her own. I told her I was so proud of her and I would always be there for support. My garden is going crazy. I’ve only lost 2 plants. I’m going to plant mint and rosemary in their place. Today I feel peaceful, content and calm. There is a lot of dreams to follow!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks I-did-it for your positive post! I think gambling thoughts will always pop up for us. But we can resist! At this point I have no one to be accountable to but myself. No more barriers can be put into place. Although I have a lot of worries about my youngest Daughter and my Granddaughter, I know she has to try it on her own. I’m really hoping she succeeds. She has my support. I will always be there for her. The biggest barrier that I can put into place is remembering what gambling robbed me of. That’s my biggest detourant. I have a lot to look forward to. Many dreams and goals ahead of me. My Mother’s situation may be sad but she has 2 Daughters who love her and will take good care of her. Life is pretty good!

[lizbeth4]

My gambling urges have lessened. They are still there but I’m managing my impulses and I haven’t gambled. I spent the day with my Mother. We played games and had dinner together. She is very aware of her failing memory. Although we’ve had serious issues, I’ve decided that I will take care of her for as long as possible. I called about my refund and it was mailed instead of direct deposited. 10-15 business days before I see it. Maybe the mistake was a intervention of some sort. I’m sure my urges will be gone by then and I will still have my money.

[lizbeth4]

Today I’m having strong gambling urges! Luckily my state refund hasn’t hit my checking account yet. I’ve watered my garden this morning and did some yard work. Now I’m doing laundry but the urges haven’t lessened. I know the urges are from my Daughter and Granddaughter leaving and my Mother’s worsening dementia. STRESS!! I just want to stop everything so I can take a breath. I’m going to make it through the day without gambling. I really have no one to turn to but this site and the people here. I trust few people concerning my addiction.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks i-did-it for your post! I text my Daughter and she and the baby are fine. My Daughter worked today for a friend, doing some handyman work. She has more work for the next 2 weeks. She said it was a good day. I’m going to devote my weekends for my jewelry making. First, I need to replenish my supplies and buy some new tools. Once my refund goes into my account, I can order what I need. There are no bead and supply places here. Since I will be making necklaces in new techniques, I’m excited! Who knows? I might create a website or try selling on EBay also. The possibilities are endless! I am keeping focused and moving forward. Gambling is in the past.

[lizbeth4]

I-did-it, Great post! My urges happen less often and I recognize my triggers. I’m glad that we are gamble free. Life is a lot better! The support here is amazing and a big part of my recovery. Has it been extremely quiet here lately? I hope you have a great day!

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter and Granddaughter are in the city. I spent the morning getting hugs and kisses and snuggles from my Granddaughter. She was aware that something was going on. I prayed to my higher power last night and I have faith that everything will work out. I had gambling urges this morning but I went home and watered my garden and roses. I’m doing household chores now! I knew I would get urges as my stress level have been high. I made a list of house maintenance projects that need to be done. Some are small but there are a few major ones. I’m capable of doing them all. This will keep me busy. I intend on working on my jewelry on the weekends. I will keep the weekends opened for that. My Sister is coming back in 12 days as we need to fix a few things at Mom’s house. I’m completely invested in not gambling.

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