[lizbeth4]

I spent the day with a friend Her Husband is scheduled for another cancer related surgery next week. We had lunch and visited on her front deck. It was nice. I’m gamble free after major urges. I’m amazed that I was able to resist. It makes me feel stronger and makes getting through the urges a little easier. I’m still don’t have cable or Wi-Fi and I’m surviving. I’m not able to post on others threads as I have to watch my data. But I’m reading the threads and sending positive vibes to everyone.

[lizbeth4]

Typo: kin

[lizbeth4]

Hi Kim, There are always going to be triggers for us. Sometimes it feels like a continuous battle. But every battle we win keeps us from gambling. Borrowing to gamble is the worse feeling. Everyday being gamble free is a blessing. We just have to keep going!

[lizbeth4]

I’m not sure how long it’s been since I’ve gambled. Personally, that doesn’t matter to me. As long as I am gamble free right now. Where would I get money to gamble? I keep a small stash for groceries, paper goods, ect. It’s not much but all of the cash on hand. See how the gambling mind works. There is currently no GA meetings in this town. That is probably why I post so often here. My gam bling thoughts have lessen. This morning I’m taking my neighbor to the Dr’s, as I had promised before we had our talk. I’m afraid I’m going to hurt her feelings as she isn’t getting what we talked about She’s asked if I can take her somewhere almost everyday and I’ve told her no. UGH !!! My motto for today. Be kind to yourself! Self care is essential for us.

[lizbeth4]

I’ve been feeling a little blue today. Working through It! I have had some gambling urges. Don’t know where this is coming from. I did a few things around the house and visited the library to check out more movies. I’ve been vegging all afternoon. I had a call from my Grandson and it put me in a better mood. I’m unable to purchase my jewerly supplies this month as I had to pay my yearly HOA fees for the year. Next month! I wonder how long will i battle with gambling urges??? It’s tiring.

[lizbeth4]

Actually, I feel like my Mother and I have come to a compromise. She hasn’t had a outburst for awhile. I see her but not daily and I back off when I feel a conflict rising. It seems to be working. I have some home projects to do this summer: painting the trim on the back of the house, staining the front deck, ect… Many things to keep me busy. I do like it when I accomplish things. Then my mind doesn’t drift to gambling.

[lizbeth4]

Well, I’ve refrained from gambling and the urges are less intense. Mom and I went to 2 stores. I was able to afford healthy foods. I’ve bought enough for the month. I stayed and played a few games with Mom. We talked about her siblings (my Aunts and Uncles) who have passed on and my Mom’s childhood. Talking about my Grandmother brought back fond memories. Not having internet for another month or more is no big deal. I have a bit selection of movies at the library and I’m getting caught up on my reading. I haven’t ordered ant jewerly supplies yet. I may only be able to get the bare minimum right now but it’s a start!!! You know? Life is pretty good right now!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks i-did-it for your post! I was able to refrain from gambling! My brain was telling me that if I could win a little money, things would be better. We all know that’s not how it works! I sent a card with a little money in it to my Grandson. He has had straight A’s all year. While I was mailing it, reality kicked in and my gambling urges lessened. Yesterday while at the library, I discovered their DVD section. A rather large selection for a small town. I have many movies to choice from. Tomorrow im taking my Mother grocery shopping and them I’m working on my front yard border. Keep busy=no gambling.

[lizbeth4]

Urges! Payday! Not going to gamble. Money is tight but all bills are paid. I’m not sure where the urges are coming from. I will beat this!!

[lizbeth4]

I did say no to her today as she kept adding places she wanted to go. I told her I had a prior commitment. I don’t mind helping her out but I don’t want her to think she can continuously call me. She needs grief counseling. Her Son is very snobbish, so I won’t be talking to him about the situation. I will figure out a tactful way to set boundaries with her.

[lizbeth4]

Your thread should be a journal of your recovery and experiences. Even though we all have the common thread of gambling, our life experiences and journeys are different. I look at my thread as a journal that I can re-read and learn from. It shows me how far I’ve come and my growth. You deserve a good life and happiness! Congrats on another gamble free month! You are doing awesome.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post on my thread. You reiterated many things I know and still trying to incorporate Into my life. Thank you for your support. Today I’m taking my neighbor to the store. She is now calling me on a daily basis. She has a son who lives with her but works during the day. I think she is lonely. I don’t mind helping her or visiting with her but it can’t be in a daily basis. I’ve already promised to take her to a Dr’s appointment next week. I need to find a way to politely decline and choose when I see her. Ugh!!!! My youngest Daughter is doing well. She is working and likes her job. My Granddaughter looks happy in the pictures she sends. That makes me happy. I’m feeling more content with my life. My garden, yard and house bring me peace. No gambling for me!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post on my thread. You reiterated many things I know and still trying to incorporate Into my life. Thank you for your support. Today I’m taking my neighbor to the store. She is now calling me on a daily basis. She has a son who lives with her but works during the day. I think she is lonely. I don’t mind helping her or visiting with her but it can’t be in a daily basis. I’ve already promised to take her to a Dr’s appointment next week. I need to find a way to politely decline and choose when I see her. Ugh!!!! My youngest Daughter is doing well. She is working and likes her job. My Granddaughter looks happy in the pictures she sends. That makes me happy. I’m feeling more content with my life. My garden, yard and house bring me peace. No gambling for me!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post on my thread. I would me upset if I had no hot water for that long! That’s not right! I hope it can be resolved before then. The daily outside stresses we face can take us over the edge. I’m still meditating and find that it does go calm me. No matter what we face, we have to remember to be kind to ourselves. Have a good sleep and take care.

[lizbeth4]

I’m feeling a little down today. I know it’s money related. I must keep on my budget and try not to overspend. I guess it’s my compulsive personality that keeps distorting my thoughts. But I know I need to keep on my path and I will see the results down the road. I don’t want to backside and gamble. The urges keep popping up and I keep fighting them. I must remember my goals and dreams!

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