[aimz98]

Haven’t posted in a while but I’m still gamble free! Woooo!

Work has been busy the past week with people panic buying, things are starting to quiet down now. The shelves are getting emptier and emptier. It’s crazy. Just 3 more shifts until my week off, so at least I don’t have to leave the house. It’s going to be boring but one thing is for certain. No gambling! It’s going to be hard if our store closes but I don’t think it will. Knowing I could’ve had the money to live comfortably without going to work. Oh well, I probably would of got bored and gambled it all away anyway.

Take care of yourselves everyone. Here’s to another gamble free day!

[aimz98]

well done stevie! keep it up and stay strong x

[aimz98]

So it’s been a week! Woo hoo! Oh how much has changed since day 1, thinking I would never be able to forgive myself for what I’ve done. Don’t get me wrong it’s been an emotional rollercoaster but it’s finally not dominating my every thought. It’s pay day tomorrow, and I have a day off! what a treat! Normally I would just gamble all day. But no! Need to go out and buy some work trousers, maybe treat myself to a nice meal and a couple beers, might even go and get my haircut I can’t remember the last time I had it cut.

Nothing more to say, drinking my coffee, shower, work. It’s my colleagues last shift today before he moves back to his home country. Gonna miss him, but it’s what’s best for him.

Best wishes everyone and here’s to another gamble free day!

[aimz98]

Thank you idi! dont think I Could’ve done it without the support from this site:). It can cause anxiety but it’s defentily exaggarated on tv shows. But I’ve had anxiety since I was a kid, I remember my first panic attack when I was about 6 or 7. I had to wear a dress for a school play and I really didn’t want to, Sent me into a full meltdown Haha. But its got better over the years, it passed quite quickly last night and I feel fine this morning. Normally I would gamble to stop the thoughts but I dont need to anymore! anyways, thanks again for taking the time to comment I really appreciate it:)

[aimz98]

haha don’t worry it’s fine! But i don’t know sometimes I feel like it’s the cause of my problems and other times it solves my problems. 16 years is long time without a break.I would like to try just to see if I feel any better but don’t think I could do it. You must have a good amount of willpower. Just read your post as well. congrats on another gf day. Keep it up x

[aimz98]

Just had to point out that im actually woman lol! Someone at work has actually suggested something similair maybe I’ll have to give it a try. Thanks stevie!

[aimz98]

my anxiety has come back quite strong tonight, not gambling related but it is one of my triggers. Sometimes I feel like I’ve done something wrong and everyone hates me. I’ll just have to find a different way to deal with it.

[aimz98]

So it’s been 6 days, not too bad. Just woke after a 10 hour sleep, didn’t realise I had it in me haha. Feel pretty good today, I finally accepted the loss. Time to start focusing on what I do have rather than what I don’t have.
My head is the most clear it’s been in years. Less anxiety, less depression, not been drinking much. I was definitely on the path to becoming an alcoholic. Brought a vape yesterday, my pipe comes today. Hopefully I’ll be tobacco free soon.

Not much too say, sitting in here drinking my coffee about to jump in the shower then off to work. Another day over. Pay day on Thursday.

Hope everyone has a good day x

[aimz98]

good luck on your Journey Stevie! You seem like you really want to change, I’m rooting for you. Day 1 of many. Please keep your diary updated, I will be reading every post for sure!

[aimz98]

It’s Monday morning and back to work today after a rare weekend off. Working full time hours the next couple weeks so that should keep me busy. Decided last night I’m going to quit tobacco. I don’t think I can give up my beloved Mary Jane just yet though so I’ve brought a pipe. I should definitely be on track to saving money rather than taking it out. I normally smoke about 10-15 a day, I’m going to aim for 5 today. I have a week off at the end or March so I can use that week to focus on getting to zero. Day 5 and feeling gooood!

[aimz98]

Thank you for commenting Ryan, I’m definitely trying to view it as an expensive life lesson. Each day is getting easier. Hope you are doing well, have a good one x

[aimz98]

yes I just have to keep reminding myself that, if I stop now they can’t take anymore. Thank you for your kind messages xx wish all the best for you x

[aimz98]

thanks for commenting! I had about 3,000 saved when I won 10,000 over a couple days. But I’m still defenitly down a few thousand over my three years of gambling. I have been reading storys non stop on here over the last few days they’ve been keeping me busy.

 I appreciate you taking the time to comment, really me made me feel less alone. I hope you are doing well, best wishes.

[aimz98]

Today has been tough, it’s been a rollercoaster of emotions. Right now I can’t stop thinking about all the things I could of done with that money. Just need to stop thinking.

[aimz98]

Mum mentioned about me buying a rug for my room, put me down for a second. First bit of temptation, had an email saying I have £50.90p on my gala account. Thought about doing 5 £10 spins but nope, I’m going to withdraw it. And the 90p. Once this this free trial of gamban runs out, then I’m gonna buy the full version.

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