[crackles86]

Hi everyone,
I’m 24 and I’m a gambling addict. When I was 18 I started to get into horse racing and very quickly became addicted. I then discovered online gambling and it went from there. I was studying at University and was in debt and sought help from my parents.
I was gambling-free for a long time. I don’t know what sparked me to do it again but I managed to get a loan out and got myself in deeper trouble. I sought help again about a year ago and was gambling-free until about a month ago.
I’m currently living in Cambodia for 3 months (until Feb) for work. I’ve just graduated from University and am cmopleting an internship. I got here early November, but to access money overseas I had to get a debit card. I got this about a week before I left, and I had a little nibble at gambling. I thought I would stop when I came to Cambodia but I didn’t – it got worse. I was (and still am) very lonely because I am here on my own. I have battled with depression and realising I am gay for a lot of my life, and the depression has kicked in again here. I have never really been to any support groups or councillors but I feel I need to take this step. However I cannot find any support here. I am living in Siem Reap, which is about 6 hours out from the capital, where there are a couple of western psychs that I’ve researched. But I don’t see anything here. I just don’t know what to do. I’ve thought about going back home early but I would tarnish my reputation by leaving my contract early. I am broke but I receive a small amount of money each month from my work for accomdation and living, which will get me by on a budget. I don’t deserve the support of my parents but my mum was very supportive when I told her. I am yet to tell my dad and I feel telling him will completely ruin my relationship with him.
I am lonely and depressed in a foreign country with no money. I don’t know how I will get through this, but I guess I just have to. The first step is not to gamble. I’ve installed a trial version of betfilter and will see if my mum will buy it for me.
Lately, the gambling addiction has been online sports betting and horse racing. I love watching sport and it is extremely difficult not to think about betting when all of the commentators discuss it and there are odds put up every 2 seconds. I don’t know if that is me making excuses for my actions, but it’s how I feel.
Today, I will not gamble.

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