Hi Chloe and thanks for your post. It sounds like you have stopped self-harming in one way, but are now self-harming by plunging yourself into debt – debt which if you don’t deal with will put you into a more desperate situation.
The practical steps you need to take are to ban yourself from places where you can gamble. There is information on this site as to how to do that – or search for GamStop on the internet. Secondly you need to talk to people close to you about what is going on. It would be good to let someone else handle your finances for you whilst you are in your early days of stopping, because it will be hard if you are tempted and have access to money.
You said you had counselling and stopped this because you couldn’t go through it all again? The question mark was yours, as if you were unsure about it. I would suggest that you go back and try to get help – your GP maybe able to help or GamCare has a list of counsellors specialising in gambling addiction and you may be eligible for free help. Support is crucial if you are not to transfer back into self-harming once the gambling addiction is being dealt with. I’m sure you know what I mean.
You are still young and although it all seems a lot to deal with at the moment – it CAN all be dealt with as long as you are open and get help from people around you. Take care of yourself.