[Victor B]

Hello people. This is the first time I have written down my thoughts and troubles regarding gambling.
It’s taken me a while to begin to understand that I am a gambling addict. About 20 years ago I started
playing around with my retirement money buying and selling stocks. Like many addicts I had a big
success at first, was up over $50,000 and then proceeded to lose it all over the next couple of years.
Was finally able about 10 years ago to agree on a sensible investment strategy with my wife
which has worked well. We built up a nice nest egg until 4 years ago when my mom passed away
and wife was diagnosed with cancer. (She’s in remission now) I turned to day trading
as a way to handle the stress (that’s what I tell myself) and lost over $30,000. Fortunately I came clean and we still had a
good amount left but the shame was awful. At that point I went to counseling and really thought I would never gamble again.
It was just so painful to lose not just the money, but the respect of my wife. All was well until this
past year when my dad died. He left me a stock account. Well, before I knew it I was trading again
and my wife discovered it. I am so ashamed. So I am in counseling and for the very first time am
writing my thoughts down to share with all of you. Reading some of the other stories here gives me
hope. There’s more to tell but for now that’s all I have to say. Thanks for listening.

[velvet]

Hello Victor and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[charles]

Hi Victor, well done on looking for help.

Day Trading is just a different form of gambling and this is a gambling addiction.

You stopped before so the good news is that you know you can stop again. This time though use support. You are already looking at counselling which is great but it is important to use ongoing support as well. Here, somewhere like Gamblers Anonymous or where ever.

The barriers that will help you are the same as for gambling as well. I am sure that your wife will be delighted to help you with the financial accountability that will mean you can’t gambel in secret. You only lost a lt of money because you had easy access to it.

Keep posting, keep using support. You can stop trading/gambling I promise you.

[lonelydad1]

Victor, I can relate to your experience. I have compulsively day traded off and on for 20 years and have lost around $100,000 in total.

I too would keep it secret from my wife and she would find out and I would feel so terrible. I recently did it again and lost about $20,000.

I realize my personality just doesnt allow for me to be successful doing it, because I always end up taking some reckless, risky trade and losing everything I gained and way more.

I hope I can stop, but there is so much tempting stuff out there to do it again.

[Victor B]

I really appreciate the comments and support! Unfortunately my wife has decided to divorce me. It’s been a tough year but in the end is probably for the best.
nI’ve been to several counseling sessions and have made great progress in coming to terms with the addictive parts of my life. I have become more of an investor and although I do sometimes act impulsively, I have been managing my money very successfully and feel confident about the future. Strange but true. Will post more soon. Thank you all.
n

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