[Prettyfoolish]

Hello, my name is Carter, I  am new here and could really use some advice, I  have very recently ruined my life and could use some advice. I  just a few weeks ago signed up for an online casino, I never really gambled much before and something terrible happened. I won. I won 12000 dollars my first day playing, cashed out 9000 and decided to play the rest which I lost quickly and decided to stop at that point. I was very excited as I really needed money because of my drug habit which I won’t get into too much as this is a gambling forum but I had a bunch of stuff at the pawnshop,  I had pawned my car, I  had an 8000 dollar installment loan. I was stoked because that would pretty much take care of all that stuff. Of course it didn’t though, I got 4 payday loans and spent that all before I received the payout but I could pay them all back as soon as I got my money. I finally got the payout and decided it had been a little while maybe I could get lucky again and I would just play a few hundred dollars, the next thing I knew I hit my limit with online check which was 3000 dollars, then I started using e transfers and I pissed away the limit for that, long story short I lost ALL of it. And my online checks had not been taken out yet, so I got hit with like 20 nsf charges for those which is another 800 bucks and I am a little worried I could get charged with fraud for that. I am terrified and have been ignoring the phone calls because I don’t know what to tell them all. I really don’t know what to do,  any advice?

[velvet]

Hello Carter and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[IRockVX]

Hey Carter,

Welcome. You’re in the right place — have you identified any GA groups near you — that’s a good place to go.

I recommend doing what others have done on here which is banning yourself from the casinos — have you used gamstop?

I also recommending continuing to write — lots. Start writing about why you gamble. Try to dig up your emotions and roots behind your lifestyle choices.

There isn’t a quick fix for this, but if you’re determined to stop, it’s a great time to connect with other people who have as well as putting your mind heart and body focused on health. We are obsessive creatures by nature—if we can get healthy addictions they can start to fill in the gap for unhealthy ones.

Also, have you used the Live Support here yet?

[Callmecrazy]

The only advice I can give, and I know this for a fact, is that you need to not chase the winnings you had lost. They’re gone. Chasing them will throw you deeper into debt and desperation.
You need to self-exclude from that specific casino that gave you the winnings as this will help you let go.

What you have experienced, your win of 12000, is nothing more than the devil luring you into a life of misery and debt. It is and has been an illusion. It is imperative that you not gamble again. The fact that your brain has experienced the rush of such a big win makes it impossible for you to play anymore for small amounts which pretty much means you have skipped the first few stages of a growing gambling addiction. You have been torpedoed rapidly into the final stage and continuing to gamble at this point equals a fast, downhill descent into misery.

What you can do right now is rest and let your worries go, just for today. There is always a window open for you, you might not be seeing it right now. But I guarantee you there is. Once you see it, use it to make your daily life easier. It might come in the form of a possible bank loan, a parent or friend willing to help, a counseler or a new better paying job. Your window might be anything.

Be easy on yourself. Just for today.

[Prettyfoolish]

Thanks I will look into gamstop and the live support, I have finally accepted that I have royally fucked up and that I am going to be having some rough times ahead. I never want to feel like this again, the big burning hot knot of stress and shame in the pit of my stomach is keeping me up at night and I can’t relax or enjoy anything. I am usually a very relaxed and happy person and I hate how irritable and cranky I have been, I gave been snapping at my co workers and I felt bad so I decided to swallow my pride and let a few of them in on what I am dealing with right now, I was actually surprised how understanding and supportive they were. After posting here I read back and what I did sounds so stupid and I still can’t believe how twisted up my mind was at that point, but it feels good to get it off my chest and just admit it. It feels good to have someone tell me that it is not the end of the world and I can get through this because for a bit there it didn’t feel like I could so thank you for the replies. I have read some of the other threads here and they really put in perspective how much worse this problem can really be, I am glad that I found this safe place and found the courage to join and write something. I had forgotten that I lent one of my friends 1000 and he just called me to say he has it now so I can use that to try to get started chipping away at this, I don’t know where to start though, I pawned my car so I kind of want to try to get that back because I feel like it’s at least worth more than the 1500 bucks I owe on it and if I am going to lose it I would rather sell it myself for a decent price. Ideally I would like to keep it so I can get to work and stuff. Anyways I am feeling a little bit better today and I am just going to keep looking forward and deal with this the best I can one day at a time and never gamble again. Thank you for giving me the courage to be able to talk about this and for the positive vibes, it has helped.

[ineed2stop]

Hey Carter, 

I can definitely understand everything that you wrote… I once before on a $15 bet on a new online casino website pretty shortly after signing up won $3000…. I couldn’t believe it. I was so happy that day, a few days later… I lost that. I don’t want to ***** over the years how much I’ve lost, it makes me angry too. The reality is, gambling has already messed up our brains. Yeah we have psychological issues, but phsyiological ones too…I know we both can overcome this. Funny thing about your name, we have a store for kids called Carters, and I really like the name Carter… I asked my sister to name her son Carter but it never happened lol… she is having another baby next month so if it’s a boy maybe she might lol

I’m going to download the app for myself as well… that’s nice to have a surprise $1000 come from your friend…do you think you will be able to get your car back?

I’m looking for the possibility of maybe having someone to connect with, even just by text about this… kinda like a buddy partner…it sounds like you’re just starting out like myself as well… if you’re at all interested, let me know.

Good luck, mate!

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