[Lewisk12]

This is how my story goes (sorry for bad English) 

I‘ve always love the game of poker, In my country I’ve played with my close friends only and we usually play small. I went overseas to study last year and I’m currently in university now as a freshman (second semester). 

When I left my country and went overseas to study I didn’t gamble at all last semester, just like any normal international student who drinks and party with friends etc. It was good and all UNTIL this semester starts. 

I began to go poker places and I was winning money at first but yeah, started losing day by day as I’ve gotten bad beat or went tilt mode etc. It was still okay at first, I lost my own money and lost my allowance on that month. I told myself not to play anymore but I kept going back to those places and kept playing. I didn’t need to buy in with cash as I can credit And pay later. and yeah, i kept losing and losing for the past 3weeks. Ive borrowed from my friends (in this university and my hometown) total up to 14k usd… I tried to win it back slowly but luck isn’t on my side… I feel so depressed and hopeless. I’ve borrowed so much money from my friends (10friends) and honestly I don’t know what to do now. I didn’t tell my parents any about this because they for sure will be heartache and disappointed. Ive Skipped many of my classes this semester and I’m sure I have to retain. im still indebt now and i seriously feel lost of hope. 

My friends are all very disappointed at me as I’ve became a different person… I used to be generous/kind/friendly but after i stepped in to the environment. I didnt hang out With my friends anymore, I stopped going to classes and I only find them when I need help with money. i feel so helpless now. Im so depressed and pressured due to the fact where I’m indebt and I lent so much money from my friends. I feel like I’ve drag them down And I didn’t keep my words. 

[IRockVX]

It’s brave and honest of you to come clean and be real about how you feel.

The consequences can sting you hard in the heart, but there is hope. There is a way out. You’re in the right place.

Find a GA Meeting near you.

Start journaling more and more — meet and talk to someone in live chat here on the support line.

Write and connect ever time you get an urge/crave to go play. You can overcome this.

Let the honesty and seed of truth within you grow and expand swim and push back the darkness.

Climb up and stand strong. One day at a time.

[dunc]

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Emma8]

Hi LewisK12

Firstly, well done for finding this forum and having the guts to admit you’re not doing well. It’s so difficult to do!

You know you need to make the change, you just have to work on remaining gambling free now. Block yourself from gambling in any way possible and check in here at least once a day. Speaking to others who are in the exact same position will help you so much!

Wishing you all the best on your journey 🙂

[Steev]

I used to borrow money from friends — even a few pounds from people I didn’t know very well. I always meant to pay them back when I was winning. I rarely won and when I did — I just carried on gambling.

You are not alone with this problem and you need to talk about it — initially to people that understand, other problem gamblers — but ultimately you need to share this with people close to you — family and friends.

If there is GA where you are now — go to the website and look up a meeting — gamblersanonymous .org should get you there. If not speak to someone on a helpline such as befrienders international and they should have details of organisations that can help.

When you feel stronger — reach out to the friend or family member whom you have the most trust in, to listen and not judge you. Even if you owe money (I found most people did not expect to get it back!) share with them what you are going through and talk about ways in which you can be supported through this. You are not a bad person — it is your behaviour which is making you do these things. As others have said block yourself from gambling places, carry as little money as possible (when you talk to someone you trust see if they can carry your money for you.) Get back to your studies and spend time catching up — that means less time to gamble with.

This is not an easy problem to crack and I don’t know anyone who has managed to do it alone. You will need support from people around you. Reach out and get this as soon as you can. I wish you well.

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