[hintline]

Hello,

I am 31 years old. Please forgive me if my english is not very good since its not my mother language.
I don’t know from where to begin but i know for sure where gambling is taking me. I’ve been gambling for 15 years but this is the year that i hit rock bottom. I must have lost around 50.000-70.000 all these years. Recently married with two babies my bank account was +45.000 2.5 years ago and its -8.323 today. I lost 20.000 in 25 days. I’ve been gambling like a maniac these past 25 days. Gambling on football, basketball, tennis, cricket, floor ball….anything …just give me anything and i can bet a couple of 000’s.

Quitting gambling seems to be very easy i assume. I’ve quit around 10 or 15 times. I dont know why i keep doing this to myself. I want to quit. I want my life back. I want to be able to sleep at night. I want to come closer to my wife and kids. I have qualms about lying, not being there the way i should have, about my „nervous” behaviour …everything. The worst of all is that i am afraid to reveal my big „secret” .My father „caught” me betting when i was 18 (from my bank statements). I remember telling me that i am not his son because of this. But as a gambler i had the answer-lie ready. It seems that my lies were good enough as i have never heard anything from him.

No one knows anything about it in my environment . But now its the first time that the financial part is a real problem. My wife thinks i have something like 20.000 or 30.000 in the bank.

I dont know what to do. I am depressed, despaired, desperate!
I am afraid i may do things that will make things even worse. Please help

[Anonim]

Hi! DDD, If you’re reading the stories on this site you know you’re not alone. I am not very good at giving advice and through all my failed attempts to quit gambling I am also not the best at taking it. However keep reading and reaching out for help until you find what works for you. Someone on this site suggested I read the book „how to stop gambling easy” by Allan Carr. I listen to the audible version and for the first time in 20 plus years I have a whole diffrent perspective when it comes to gambling. You might want to give it a try. I wish you the best.

[hintline]

Thank you very much . I will read it.

[jansdad]

Hi hintline and welcome to the forum. Look at it this way: if you’re wife thinks you have 20K in the bank and you have -10 it means you’re „only” 30K in the hole. I mean it’s not „only” of course, but at your age it’s not that big a deal.
I actually want to say it is not big deal IF YOU NEVER GAMBLE AGAIN.
I know this for a fact, if you stop now and never place another bet very soon all these losses and everything you went through will seem as a bad dream. But if you continue, if you chase your losses, if you borrow money to feed your addiction, the chances are you will lose your family, friends and worse.
People here will advise you to tell your wife. I personally think that if you’re sure you won’t gamble again and can plausibly hide the losses from her until you make up for them working, you might even consider sparing her the aggravation.
But you must stop gambling. If you’re not sure you can, then you probably need to tell her immediately. The hell, in that case, will break loose very soon and you owe her to at least prepare her.

Come here often. Read posts and post yourself. It helps.

[hintline]

Thanks for your reply. Really encouraging post from you . I feel-believe that i have the determination to never gamble again. This is what i am saying to myself. That i will never gamble. I hope and i will do my very best to not gamble again.As far as my wife is concened…i believe we gamblers first need to take into consideration the character of the person we are about to share the problem before we say anything. I believe that sharing the problem can sometimes prove to be a bad option.

[Autor]

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