[Squirrell68]

First time on this forumn my life is total mess pressed self destruct button wen i started gambling stopped nov 17 this year debt marriage family friends all in chance of losing everything why do we put ourselves through it and destroy so many lifes around us

[Steev]

We don’t choose to put ourselves and our families through the mill, it is the way that constant gambling has re-wired our brains so we cannot control our behaviour.

That how it is until we recognise that we need to stop. Then we need to act. Once we have stopped gambling for a while, we can see things more clearly and we can put things in perspective. Debts can be paid back, families and friends made amends to. It takes time to do all these things – but the sooner we stop gambling and taking responsibilty for what has happened – the sooner the healing can start.

You are at the start of the recovery process – keep it going. Get as much support as you can through this difficult time. It will get easier the longer you can stay gamble free. I wish you well.

[Paul Dent]

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Squirrell68]

Having really bad day today had my first gamcare cbt course one to one with councelling brought back all emotions wen I was gambling triggers and why we do these things hurt destruction to people we love and care about people say it gets easier nearly two months now gf but pain guilt hurt will b there foreever

[i-did-it]

Hi squirrel
As you move forward in life, you will learn to forgive yourself, to develop compassion for the person who never asked for but was nonetheless struck down with this addiction.

If I wrote the above post what would you reply to me ? Would you tell me I deserve the shame and the guilt or would you tell me that I am taking action to stop this horrible addiction in its tracks and I deserve to be commended for that?

Self-compassion is a huge part of recovery – because for all we have hurt other people, we have hurt ourselves more. We need to be kind to that person inside us (our inner child?) who became lost in addiction and who has struggled to break free from it.

Addiction is not a choice we make – recovery however is !

[Squirrell68]

2 months stopped now pain guilt remorse will live with me forever love my family so much and as time settles realise more and more what devastation and destruction I’ve caused but i do believe every one in some shape or form deserves a chance to put things right hopefully I can so easy to see why people take easy way out and end their lives

[i-did-it]

Hi Squirrel,

Part of recovery is accepting the things we cannot change. Feeling guilty will not change the past but will take the joy out of the present .
Squirrel when someone ends their life might seem like the easy way out but it is a life sentence for those left behind – their lives are forever changed – the will live with the trauma forever.
Trust me when I say it is much easier to deal with a loved one’s debt, theft, addiction , crime … anything is easier to deal with .

If you are having thoughts of suicide, please see your GP or contact the Samaritans . A little help is sometimes all it takes to have a happier view of our world .

Keep posting Squirrel.

[Autor]

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