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Good day,
I am reaching out to your foundation because I am seriously distressed!
This may take some time but please read my message through.
I am 37 years, with a wife and 2 kids. I was laid off in 2017 and I have been doing menial jobs to sustain my family.
However, I got into gambling. Now I am in trouble. I am in so much debt and there are no help centres I can contact in Lagos, Nigeria.
Please help me. I do not want to go to jail, my 2 daughters are 5 and 1 respectively. I have breached the trust of friends and family through gambling.
I do not need money to start again. I will find a way to get up again since I have stopped gambling.
All I need is to settle my debts and I will be back up again with God’s help.
Everything I say is verifiable and my identity is also verifiable. Please I need help. HELP ME!!
Please reach out me. Trying not to listen to the suicidal voices in my head. Help me! I don’t want to die and I don’t want to go to jail.
HELP ME PLEASE.
I’m no longer gambling but debt is trying to steal my joy away.
Help me on the Forum please.
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All is not lost brother. feeling that same pain man. Firstly i must say welcome and thank you for posting. You are in the right place. To seek support advice and guidance. Keep reading people testimonies on this website. Rewire your mind by it. It help me. Keep journaling here on your progress.
It takes one step at a time to recover and rediscovery your self worth. Speak to your financial institution to reduce your payments. Block your self away from websites that contains casinos betting etc. Install gamban. Barriers must be in place between you and those places.
Second you need to be honest come clean to your wife. Set aside your ego and pride let her know everything abt your problem.
Brother keep your mind on peace and positivity that you are going rise above this. Keep your mind distracted; read alot of this addiction; look at youtube videos Santos Rolon Jr. Soldiers of self mastery.
Keep on journaling. Self talk.observe your thoughts. Look at where u are now and continue to imagine you are GF and debts free.
You are an amazing person.
Thank you bro. -
Don’t listen to the suicidal voices in your head. If you are considering this as a way out of your problems – think about what state this will leave your wife and children in. Do they deserve to grow up without a father.
If you are planning to do something like this please contact these helplines NOW: Lagos suicide hotlines, by the Lagos State Government: 08058820777 and 09030000741
– “through which residents can ask questions, make inquiries and seek help from professionals early enough to allow for appropriate intervention.”As for your debt – firstly don’t add to it. You have said nothing about stopping gambling – you need to address this so that any money you get goes to paying off your debts and not to increase them.
Pay your necessary debts first. Things you need to pay so that you don’t lose your home, services (electricity) etc. Any other debts which are left – talk to the people you owe. Explain that you will pay a little each month (or whenever you get paid) until it is resolved. They would prefer to get some money from you rather than none at all. See if they will lessen interest payments or suspend it until you are in a better place. Is there a way of increasing your earnings?
Speak to someone you trust about your situation, don’t keep it all to yourself. Two heads are better than one and someone else may see a way through that is not clear to you. Above all else – don’t see suicide as a way out – it is a permanent thing and your problems, difficult as they may seem at the moment are only temporary. I wish you well.
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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I am sure steev will help with names of organisations that can help where u r. He is good at that.
I am nearly two and a half years gf and owe a lot more than the amount you owe not that it’s a competition but to show there is life after stopping gambling and we deal with one thing at a time. It gets better, it really does. I too was threatened with prison over bills here in the U.K. I had just neglected. I dealt with that first when I felt strong enough to do so. Here in the U.K. if you explain your situation ie recovering gambler they do treat you different and most but not all have been much less harsh than they might be. You will have days where u don’t feel like doing anything and not being able to face it early on and then days when you do and deal with it all one at a time. I am still dealing with it but I can see progress. One day at a time. -
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I think Monica has more faith in my than is warranted. I don’t know of any organisations that help with debt in Nigeria. All I can say is that you must not let embarrassment stand in the way of asking for help. I would speak to your family – if you have not already and failing that talk to people on the two helplines that I have sent you in a previous message.
You really need to talk to people locally, as they will have the knowledge of what will and what will not work. It may be exploring ways in which you can work on-line from any country and there are sites which will help you to do this – try googling them as I am not sure I can put links on here. I’m not sure what else I can do to help but if you have any specific questions please get back to me.
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