- Dette emnet har 23 svar, 8 deltakere, og ble sist oppdatert 5 år, 9 måneder siden av .
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Innlegg
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Hi Everyone,
I have never done one of these before but I feel now is the time to begin.
Since the age of about 18 I have gambled (now 25) mostly on football. It all started off pretty harmlessly and a couple of years ticked by without alarm.
As I got older the problem began!
I had just moved in with my girlfriend in our first house and had started paying rent, bills etc.
I had a decent job earning ok money but I was still gambling and the problem was getting worse.
It really hit home one day when it came to paying rent and I had nothing! So what did i do?
I turned to gambling and got myself in a deep hole. I ended up taking out payday loans to help me pay rent.
Worst of all i started lying to my girlfriend about my financial situation. I hated myself and was so angry.
Needless to say my partner eventually found out and then the problem really hit home hard.
I was in over my head with a big problem.
Long story short I stopped gambling, got myself out of debt and continued life (Lucky Me) for a little over 2 years.
Then Bang.
Recently I Gambled again! after swearing to myself i would never ever go back!
I hated myself and within a blink of the eye i was down £500.
I lied to my girlfriend again and eventually it all came out.
I NEARLY lost everything.
Fortunatly Mypartner has stuck with me and we are battling through this problem together this tie instead of trying to bury the issue.
I am now 2 months gamble free and I am doing well and trying to keep myself occupied with other things.
I have never done one of these diarys before so lets hope it helps.
Joe
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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Well done on your gamble free time.
Having a support such as your gf is fantastic, being accountable is a big help in battling this addiction.
You seem to have found what works for you…..keep on keeping on!
This addiction will take your soul if you let it. Im happy to read such a positive post.
Hope to read more of your story,
Love K xxx -
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Well done Joe, one day at a time can achieve great things.
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Well done on your gamble free time Joe.
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Good to see you back here Joe, though it is tough that you have gambled again. You are not stupid. You have an addiction and that will lead you to gambling if you let your guard down.
You don’t say how you gambled – did you by-pass the on-line blocks you set up – if so you need to strengthen these. If you are now on your own you will need to get good support for yourself. It is easy to think, «if I have a bet I won’t hurt anyone except myself.» Does anyone close to you know about your gambling, that can support you? If not consider talking to your GP about counseling, or visiting a GA or similar group locally.
There are the groups here if you need to chat about what is going on. That might help to identify triggers and keep you away from betting again. I wish you well.
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I am sorry Joe! I know it’s easy for me to say but do not beat yourself up. You were doing good, you took a wrong turn and now you are back to square one but you know that you have to do something diffrent so it does not happen again. You are so young and can turn your whole life around. I struggled at your age and I still do today, being in my late 40s. I promise the crappy feeling can and will pass. You just have to be determined that when it does you will not want to end up back to square one…… I know about square one, I have had several of them. (With that being said maybe I am in no position to give advice)
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More than that – it looks like you got a lot out of the meeting. I hope this is the start of something regular for you. It would be great to hear about your 1, 5, 10 year celebration meetings – but as we all know, for now, take it one day at a time. Congrats on 10 days gf as well.
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Well done on getting to that meeting Joebev, a big step.
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Just read your journal. I was sad to see you relapsed, but not at all surprising. However, I was very happy to see that you went to your first GA meeting because I know from experience how beneficial it is. I think you’ve finally found part of the solution to gambling – being honest about EVERYTHING as you put it. Massive respect to you for pulling it off, I myself is struggling with being honest all the time, but I know it’s one of those things that we must incorporate to our character if we want to have a chance at staying gambling free long term.
All the best mate and take care!
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There are many people who have years of gambling free life behind them – so please have faith that it can happen.
I know what worked for me – I can’t say if it will work for others, but being honest was a key factor. Also not keeping «stuff» to myself, but finding a safe space to offload it – whether that be a counselling room or a group room or a close and trusted friend. There will be times when things feel like they are too much to deal with (debt was a key one for me) and the only solution is to clean the mind of all rational thoughts – by gambling. Of course, gambling only makes the situation worse, but we don’t see that when we are in that pre-action state.
By pre-action state I mean that time when we have a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other. Should I go to the casino? I could just stay for 1 hour and limit myself to £20. I learnt, eventually, that when I hear that conversation in my head – that it is a trigger that needs to be dealt with – and I side with the angel and go off and talk about what has brought me to that point.
Seems like I am rambling. Congrats on your gambling free time and I am looking forwards to new posts.
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Well done, Joe!
A marvelous achievement! -
A great achievement JoeBev, one day at a time is small and achievable yet can also be life changing. Keep doing the things that are working for you – one day at a time.
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WOW Joe keep it up keep writing. Continue to inform others about your major accomplishments by being honest with yourself. Thanks for sharing man
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