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Innlegg
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I am sick, upset and in physical pain. I have lost it all today playing roulette … I kept on betting martingale and lost everything. I am scared to even disclose the figure.
The only good thing is, I am not in debt. I don’t owe anyone any money. But my savings ? All gone.
I have just filled in the GamStop form. Emailed the online casino I was playing at and told them to ban me.
I never ever want to gamble again. It’s a evil, soul destroying sport. I could have given all of the money I lost to a charity or something but no, I was greedy. I just wanted to make more wealth very quickly. I didn’t even have a plan of what I would
do if I had won more money. -
Well done Inafalsetto for seeking help. Especially well done for seeking help before you have got into debt. Those are good action you have taken – I would further advise that you get a gambling blocker on all your internet devices – I use Gamban.
Build up as many barriers as you can as these give you thinking time when urges to gamble come.
Try not to look back at the money lost – try to draw a line in the sand and step over it . It’s hard to do but financial recovery can happen very fast especially when you don’t have debt.
Hope to see you in a group sometime .
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Unfortunately most of the time it needs to be a sickening loss to push in the right direction. Congrats for not putting yourself in debt to chase, you should be very proud of yourself for not doing that and having the control to stop. Today is the start of the rest of your life, and it’s only going to get better from here.
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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I know it is a heavy price to pay to find out that you cannot gamble again – but please learn this lesson and don’t go chasing your losses, (that urge will come and it is hard to resist.) I agree with what I-did-it says and in addition I would suggest that you get good support – either through counseling (if you are in the UK – you can access this via Gamcare) or from a self-help group like Gamblers’ Anonymous.
Great that you are not in debt – now is the time to stop completely. I wish you well.
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Hi infaletto Firstly I admire your complete honesty, not only with us but with yourself.
Your gambling has become addictive so that financial recovery through gambling will never happen and if it does it will just drive you to gamble more – that is the nature of this addiction.
It is hard because the urges can be overwhelming (all part of the addiction) but keep putting off acting on these urges until they pass -and they will. (You can google how long they last) .
Keep strong Infalsetto. You are working so hard at this you deserve to succeed.
However this is what you are feeling right now (the urges) and I would say it might be an idea to sit with thode urges – give yourself some time – the money doesn’t have to be recovered today – decide to gamble in three months and avoid gambling until then . The reason I say this is that forever always seemed too long to me, and one day at a time felt like “why bother . Review the situation in two months.
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You wrote: «I am battling the urge just to drive out to a casino this weekend in another town and take £5000 with me to see whether I can win some of my savings back.
I lost a total of £28,000 in savings that I had. Even if I could recoupe £15,000 I could convince myself that I simply had the most expensive life experience to date. And I can preach to others to never gamble.»
If you did this you would lose £5000 – then you would be in debt and paying interest – so losing more. Even if you were to win it wouldn’t be £15K – so you would keep playing to win that amount and lose it all. I know. I have been there.
If you don’t need the credit cards for anything else cut them up – or speak to the bank about lowering the credit limit to what you need for day to day living. If you can, hand them over to a trusted loved one to handle until you feel strong enough to take control again.
I know writing off £28K is a big ask – but believe me, it is what you need to do if you are going to be gamble free for any length of time. Think of it as a bad investment decision. Put your energy into your work and other (non-gambling) pastimes. Now you know you cannot gamble «normally» – think of yourself as a non-gambler and that you can’t gamble because it isn’t your thing. I wish you well.
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Sometimes you just lose every spin from the first until you have nothing left. The idea about chasing with another 5000 would be too risky and you know it. Of course, you could win but to win back 15000 can only happen if you take even more risks. And if you won back 3000 (not too unlikely), would you feel happy and satisfied then? Probably not…you would continue and probably be in debt within an hour or less.
It’s all very sad and depressing. Lost all my savings too (not as much as you but all of it). Get urges frequently but after 3 weeks I only think about it 1-3 times a day. It becomes easier. Why did you gamble in the first place? How can you prevent yourself from doing the same thing again?
Be a good person, learn from your mistake and enjoy your life right now…Don’t wait until you have got 15000 or 50000, you can be happy right now. What I mean is: Try put your loss in the background for a while and make a plan for your future (AND don’t do it again, you a not a gambler anymore!)
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So sorry to hear that you gambled Infalsetto.
You do know what to do and you have said it – you will self exclude .
I know how awful it feels when we just lose , but the addiction makes us forget fast so now is a good time to set up those self exclusions .You will bounce back Inflasetto even if it doesn’t seem like it right now – do everything you can to make sure you can’t gamble .
The important thing so that you realise that we are never able to walk away no matter how big the win.Forgive yourself, show yourself self compassion – be kind to yourself – you can do this – just add a few more barriers .
Keep strong my friend .
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Sorry to gear about your recent loss Sometimes you Just need One last spin before you quit?
One can Win in roulette but if you lose enough it becomes impossible to get a Head again (unless you have unlimitted Cash). If One wins it gets difficult to stop before losing the winnings and often More than that.
After 3,5 Weeks I have earned back 2,5% (extra hours and paid for something I never used) of my losses. Not much but slowly I earn it All back. You can do the same…Much better to earn than Win it back. It’s safer and supports the goal of non-gambling from now on.
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Hi Infalsetto
That really good news about your win.
Please don’t think I am spoil your win for you but I have often read similar posts – in fact I could have written similar posts.
Please muster every ounce of will power you have and cut yourself off the casino or at least put your money somewhere you can’t spend it .Unfortunately the addiction will still be there and will tempt you to return to win more – you probably already have thoughts of doing it all again .
This is a lifeline – a huge help to leaving gambling behind . Take action to safeguard this money Infalsetto .
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Couldn’t agree more with i-did-it!
Congratulations! This makes your situation much much better BUT ONLY if you stop. You could win more or lose more than ever. It will always be so.
You have got a second chance but may or may not get a third.What would have happened if you had lost this time? What if you had lost again after that? Would you even have been able to borrow more money?
You have a fine starting point for a new gambling free life if you are ready.
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I agree completely with i-did-it and LSA. I too often lost a ton of money (the equivalent of 1-2 years of salary), won all or most of it back, only to not take advantage of many lucky “second chances” to flush it all away again plus more. For me, I never had enough will power to take advantage of these many “second chances” and I felt invincible that I could win more of my losses back. Congrats on your win! As you said, if you learned from your lesson and can use it as a teaching moment, that is a positive outcome.
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Hi everyone,
I find myself in a similar position. Similar to inafalsetto i suffered a big loss that wiped out my savings. I won it all back and about 4k more only to lose the extra bit and a little more. After that second loss I was back to having recovered about 85% of my initial savings. I self excluded and told myself to stop. The first couple of days were tough but it got better. It’s been about three weeks now and for some reason today was extremely tough. I found myself looking up different casino accounts to set up. The only thing that stopped me was not being able to figure out a way to withdraw my potential winnings without my wife seeing it on our bank accounts (my wife has access to my statements now). I am nervous that I am going to find a way and am really dissapointed that these thoughts have reentered my mind. Part of me says I just want to get back the last little bit that I lost. anther part just says that if i did restart i would just start from «0» and just play for fun like it was intended.
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I feel I have a lot in common with you and inafalsetto but I did as «Newday», I did not stop in time. I hope you do. I hope inafalsetto does! But I know that you have to be ready to stop. I wrote in here but didn’t listen so you may not listen to us but you should all just quit gambling.
I hardly believe and do not recommand anyone to play for fun. If someone writes in here, they can’t play for fun anymore and will never be able to do it again.
Perhaps you should tell your wife about this? She probably supports you? How can you prevent a relapse? Remember, you won and you will regret when you lose it again! I felt ill for days…You may have experienced the same – do you want to go through it all again?
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