I haven’t been on here for a while but I have just relapsed Also. I have self-excluded from all casinos in Ontario but my main problem is on-line slots. I just completed a week long program for gamblers back in May, attend counselling and a weekly women’s group. I lasted 3 weeks and then I got an offer by email to reopen accounts with bonus’ and I did. I got up to $4000 and didn’t stop. I’ve now been chasing losses ever since and now accumulated another $15000 in debt on top of the $40000 I already owe. I have tax debt now too. I’m in way over my head now and retirement is ruined. Today is my fathers birthday and he’s been passed away now for 7 years and tonight just 10 minutes ago, I closed my on line accounts and came on here.
I too have spent all my money and have to get through the next few weeks without any and my son is always asking for money and I won’t be able to help. Why do we put ourselves through this. I was getting on the right path again and I blew it again. So you are not alone. It’s a tough battle but people go recover.

Brilliant that you recognise exactly what happened to cause your relapse.
I guess you now know what you need to do.
You have had some gamble free time, don’t beat yourself up too much, move on and start over.
I first excluded from gambling venues 8 years ago. In that time I have had maybe 6 ‘slips’ (I hate that word but I don’t know a better one) Each time I have let my exclusion lapse as we can only renew every 2 years.
Every time I entered a venue during that time I felt physically sick. But I still gambled. Thankfully not too much damage was done to the bank account, my self worth and sanity however………
Its just not worth it.
Take care,
Love K xx

Hi Time to Change,
I take a very straight line on recovery and I probably shouldn’t say anything until I have a year under my belt… But I find what you said as some poor excuses. You’re blaming your weakness to not follow through on a promise to yourself. The truth is that you’re weak. You aren’t strong enough to stay away from gambling. Using your barriers being down isn’t a viable excuse. If you read my posts you’re going to see that I discuss this often. Is a alcoholic supposed to never have money in his pocket again or never travel to any cities that serve alcohol. the answer is absolutely not. Just like an alcoholic gambling is everywhere. You can’t exclude yourself from every online gaming site and you can’t get away from places in the world where gambling is legal. I can’t even buy a donut without having to look at lottery tickets and keno.
What I’m trying to say is… the issue isn’t that you had cash or a card, or that you were in a part of town you weren’t excluded from, or that your hand was hurting. And lets be honest you could have gone for a run or walk with a bad hand. Worked legs, etc. So saying your hand hurts and thats a hat trick or whatever you called it is a joke.
You wanted to gamble so you did. It’s that simple.
If you want to stop them put those barriers up, but those barriers aren’t going to be there forever. You need to be strong enough to stop and not allow the thoughts back in your head.
I hope you can stop and I’m here for you if you ever want to chat.
Jon

The more time that passes without gambling – the more “OK” seeming it becomes to gamble a little again.. Since the memories of how bad you felt have faded, you have a bit more money in the bank.

It almost feels harmless to indulge a little in what feels like an old hobby.. You only need to see the relapse posts on here to know that it’s a trap, I know how hard it is to keep that in mind.. but try 😀