[i won a new life]

well I’ve been on this site before and it helped a lot, placing safe guards ect. I have hit rock bottom, no more credit to get, nothing else to lose (money wise) I have a caring family that still supports me, I feel horrible with guilt. I lost my job, my wife, my finances. I’ve been terribly depressed but still see a shimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. All I have to do is not gamble, sounds easy but something takes over me and that is the compulsion. I’m starting over, it hurts but I’m not alone.

[i won a new life]

ODAAT

[i won a new life]

I feel if anyone reads my post they are entitled to a bit of a story to my gambling history. It started with online slots (the crack cocaine of games) It’s gonna hit, just one more hit then I’ll cash out. Never do till the money is gone. Sometimes I would make a deposit and take a bonus go right to the black jack table and put it all on one hand to double up and play slots with. Anyway then I got addicted to poker as thought it wasn’t gambling. After a constant downswing it just doesn’t make sense to continue with. I’m looking at it as failed business and have accepted I was wrong and it was my fault. In the end the money lost meaning to me I could spend days spinning slots, and feel like I won the lotto with every small hit. I just gambled yesterday and won then lost a significant amount of money. I felt terrible with myself and it has brought me back here again. I need to be honest and place barriors to prevent this stupidity again. ODAAT

[i won a new life]

One day at a time I try to make sense of it. I was a fool, I was stupid playing a game where only the house wins.

I try to make excuses, I have some money and no need to gamble.

I woke up and thought well wouldn’t it be nice if I had won a huge jackpot and be starting a new life not having to work instead I am going to gambling therapy.

It could be worse, I still have my life. Need to get a job and forget about my past mistakes. Also I need to keep a diary to remind myself why it hurts so much.

One more vacation I can’t take, one more bill I can’t pay, one more day of struggling. All my fault, as I type I almost smiled to be free and just live life as I did before I started gambling makes sense to me.

I don’t ever want to feel this pain again. Will have to look back and keep posting. On with the day and may it be a good one.

[i won a new life]

One Day At A Time I struggle, I haven’t gambled but I don’t have a job and lots of time so it’s been pretty tempting.

I haven’t made a mistake but still feel like crap. Think I’m having a bad day, won’t drink won’t gamble just not motivated to do anything.

[charles]

Hi and welcome.

If this site helped before than it can help again. Now, while you are feeling the pain, would be a good time to get some barriers in place. Have you self excluded from your usual gambling sites? Installed a blocker? Put finanacial accountability in place?

Keep posting and let us know the positive steps that you are taking.

[i won a new life]

yes to blocking, self exclusion. Even from the live casino which was offering me free hotel stays as the amount of money I gave them. Just done with it. Problem is I need to get back on track to a normal life, my head is still spinning and it makes it hard to focus on what I need to do which is let go and move on. Thank you for your kind words and support.

[vera]

Try to hang in. There is a Live Group starting in a few minutes .One hour at a time….

[i won a new life]

Sometimes one minute at a time, need to get out get some exercise. I really felt like I was stuck in a dark place, feeling better today. My losses this year were small compared to lifetime but it all doesn’t make sense, truly like a drug addiction.

I haven’t got a job yet but haven’t tried too hard yet, wondered if there is any legit way to make money online other than gambling or trading stocks… all high risk.

I think I might start writing a self help e-book in my free time

It’s hard to believe how many people are going through the same thing, a lot haven’t admitted they have a problem.

ODAAT

[i-did-it]

Hi I won . i think that book sounds like a great idea but make sure u have a gambling blocker on ur computer !
With my own recovery I found that the things I wanted to do least were the things that helped me most – eg hubby finding out !

Put every barrier in place and really go for it this time ! You are winning a new life minute by minute !

[i won a new life]

Honesty is most important at this stage. Your right and I know nobody owes me anything, I need to heal myself and a new and better life will come in time.

An Idea for anyone on the road to recovery, If you come across some money that you would have used to gamble with give it to a trusted person to save it for you. Every time you do this you are truly winning.

I was socially withdrawn from people being selfish in my own guilt. Each day is getting easier, taking on tasks and completing them has given me a boost of energy in the right direction.

[lizbeth4]

Hi I won a new life, Just hang in there. Put all barriers in place. Is there anyone that you could trust and who could support you emotionally right now?? Being honest with yourself is one of the hardest things that I had to do but also the most freeing!!! You will heal and make a new life for yourself. It just takes time and hard work. Just take it one day, hour at a time. Stay strong!!!

[i won a new life]

I think all gamblers including myself have been blinded by our gambling. Most of us started by winning a small amount of money and after that the hook is set on addiction. In any session I played I always chased my losses trying to break even just on that session, devestating results. I don’t have many close friends for emotional support which is part of the problem and why gambling attracted me. It’s going to be a hard climb out of this mess, I have debts to pay and no income so getting a job is a priority. I’m hoping to clear my debts by next year and leave this behind. I feel for all the others just give it up, worse than a drug addiction. Ask for help put you barriers in place. I am really looking forward to just get on with life, it could be worse, focus on the positive things.

[i won a new life]

Well I promise to keep checking in. It makes me sad to read stories of how people have destroyed their lives do to gambling and I don’t find it helping me right now as I’m in my own struggle. I have admitted that I’ve become powerless over gambling and in an effort to save my life have stopped one day at a time.

I have to agree that after a period of “clean” time I had relapsed thinking I was back to normal and could control my betting. It was a huge painful mistake, my compulsive behavior took over and we know where that goes.

Just for today I won’t gamble and I hope someone else won’t too, we are fighting for our lives. I do a lot of reading and found my addiction was sub conscious, I was gambling to escape my negative emotions.

I am now looking into root causes for those negative emotions which gambling only made worse after the temporary escape.

I want myself back and that’s what I’m fighting for, please dig deep think about your family and the life you had before you were powerless.

We can all stop and stay stopped one day at a time. Urges come and urges go, usually caused by negative emotions and gambling will only make them worse.

I’m taking some time off from my computer to help with the depression I’m suffering, exercising, walking, and reading a lot. I’ll check in and post in a few days.

[charles]

Hi, I look forward to hearing how ytou have spent your gamble free time over the next few days. the important thing is that you keep using support. if being away from your computer limits that then maybe look at other options as well, Is there a Gamblers Anonymous meeting in your area?

Keep posting.

[投稿者]

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