Charles – thanks for reading my updates and thanks for your your message. My employment is 9am – 5pm and I am paid approx £30k. I have earned every penny I have to date as I left school at 18 and walked into a job the very next day. I have been unemployed only twice for 2 and 3 weeks at a time otherwise I have always held down employment and at one time I had 5 jobs when I was at university. Hard work and the benefits of doing so was instilled in me from a young age and I continue to work hard at everything I do. I have always occupied my time doing something rather than nothing and at present I have the mind-set that I can put my energies into something other than gambling to get back the losses I have made gambling. I have a payment plan agreed with a debt consolidation service and financially I am pushed, but, I can eat and my debts remain unnoticed to my partner. I want to make money to pay extra towards my debts so that these are paid off sooner. I have considered downloading software to block gambling sites but this is something i’m not prepared to do especially on a shared computer/laptop. Thanks for your message it really helps to know that someone is reading.
Day 2
I’ve not had any urges today but this is probably linked to knowing that I don’t have any money to gamble with. Historically, i’ve never liked gambling on a Monday so I know it sounds a bit weird but it’s never took my interest.
I read on another person’s journal last night that they were living a nightmare and each day was difficult to get through. My nightmare is that my days are full of my mind asking me ‘How am I going to get this money back?’. I can’t move on, I can’t get past this dread at the moment of not knowing how I can get money to ramp-up payments to get rid of my gambling debt. However, i’m pleased it’s Day 2 as it’s not Day 1 and i’m feeling upbeat and positive.
I’ve been reading about passive income streams today and how big time effort in the first instance can lead to future incomes. I’m toying with several ideas like an online blog with affiliate marketing but i’m not a social butterfly to have regular traffic visiting my blog, or, i’m not interesting for people to want to spend time reading about me and my escapades and added to this I don’t have many friends in-fact I could ***** them on one hand. I’m going to keep my thinking hat on and see what transpires.
Tomorrow is food shopping I think and i’m going to have to pay as my partner has paid the last three weeks. I’ve evaded paying but I got paid last week so it’s definitely my time to pay.
I’m dearly hoping to keep this journal updated daily and I will do my best to post on other journals so that together we can support each other.
Thanks again for taking the time to read my update.
Sean