[kin]

Addiction is like a tiger lying in wait for its prey.
Unfortunately, we are the prey !
The tiger is extremely patient
as it wait for the optimal moment to pounce on its unsuspecting victim.
It is well camouflaged with denial, minimization,
rationalization, and other psychological defences,
so it is hard to distinguish the menace from its surroundings.
Its stealth make it hard to identify
as it is sneaking up and preparing to attack.
Addiction is cunning and baffling.
Many times its victims do not know they are being stalked until it is too late.
80% percent of newcomers relapse in their first year.
We cannot defeat addiction in the traditional sense.
The solution begins with a paradox:
Victory is achieved through surrender, not in battle.
If we surrender, our disease loses its control over our life.
It doesn’t disappear. It doesn’t go away. It never go away!
It merely recedes into the background.
Yet it is always there,
Waiting for a lapse in our spiritual program,
Example :
When we are feeling down and out
because we have gotten into a bitter argument with our spouse, or
When we have received a special recognition  at work
and feel that we deserve to celebrate.
It will act on any opportunity to regain control of our life.
The first thing to consider is whether our disease is once again trying
to establish a foothold in our life.
It may be setting us up in order to take charge
and again run the show.
Remember, it is always looking for that opportunity
to convince us to return to gambling.
A person in early recovery looks for all the ways that
his gambling isn’t as bad as those around him / her.
I wasn’t that out of control,
my spouse haven’t left me,
my debt is manageable,
I do not have huge credit cards debt,
I did not borrow from  illegal money lender,
I didn’t lose my job ,
I m not a bankrupt,
I do not have to steal or borrow to gamble…etc….
the list go on and on and on.
Before long, he convinced himself that he / she can return to gambling,
he just need to control it better this time around.
This is a person who has not truly surrendered.
This disease is capable of convincing us to go ahead and gamble again
because this time it will be different , I am not a slot machine addict.
The addicted part of us will insist on this position,
despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
Do you know why ?
Because this disease will selectively ignore information
that validates our powerlessness.
This filtering is called the Selective Inattention.
The information that indicate we are an addict
and unable to control our slot machine gambling is ignored.
Watching out for how the beast may be sabotaging our recovery is crucial.
So watch and listen.
It will be our own life that we save if we keep our vigil.
 

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