[rdemm]

Dear all,

To provide some context about myself, I’m a 22 year old (almost) University graduate, working full time and earning around £20,000 per year. I work full time managing a betting shop that begins with W and ends with Hill. So why am I here? I’ve recently had to come to accept that I do indeed have a gambling problem, ironic and arguably difficult considering the line of work that I’m currently in I know.

When I think about how it began and the triggers I suppose my earliest memory is being 18, at a shop, and wanting a coat that was £150 and having £80 in my wallet and even though I had the money at home I wanted it quicker so went to the ladbrokes opposite and put £80 on red in order to get it, it came in green 0 and I walked our promising I’d never be so stupid again, (I bought the coat anyway).

From here, I put on the occasional £2/£5 football accumulator bet on over the next couple of years, once or twice putting £100 on a single team to win at odds of around evens but this was very rare and I probably did this only twice.

Around 6 months ago upon getting my current job I was playing a demo game on one of the machines so I knew more about it for the customers. I hit the jackpot and made (a fake) £500 on the FOBT, from this I decided that I’d go and have a go on the betfred in town and see if I could repeat the trick. I went to town and lost £100 on their FOBT, without so much as an £3 win anywhere along the way.

Annoyed, by this I then signed up to an online casino site, and in trying to get my £100 back, quickly saw myself lose £1,000 on roulette. At this point, I probably had about £1200 left of my overdraft putting my balance somewhere around £-600. I was angry and annoyed at myself for being so stupid, but then the site that I had lost the money on sent me an email informing me I was a VIP member and an offer for a 100% deposit match up to £1000, what luck I thought. I deposited £1000, got my £1000 bonus, withdrew my real money and put the bonus money on red, it landed and I made my money back; £1000 back.

From here for the next month or two I played the system, carefully using the bonus money they would give me for guaranteed returns. Of course in the end they caught onto this and my accounts were suspended after making around £3,000 from them. Being by now in a far better financial position and having a balance of around £4,000.

The issue is, after this I thought that would be it, I’d ‘beaten the bookie’ as the saying goes. But over the past week or two I have come so so close to giving it all back. I will have a bet on something for £200 ish, and should it lose then head to the roulette tables to get it back. All online of course. The other day my account read that it had deposits of £200, £400, £1000, £2000 and £4500 (thank god the £4,500 on red landed and I made my money back with a slight bonus) but I am fully aware that what I am doing is lunacy and very quickly my luck will run out. I’ve taken the preventative measures of self excluding from these sites I am signed up to but I know that there are so many more out there that I will always be able to find one should I get the sudden urge to do so.

Essentially, what I’m here for is help and advice. How do you stop? Should you do it gradually by lowering stakes? Can you suddenly stop? I’m currently still ahead by a few thousand, should that make it easier? All of my money is currently in my current account, should I move it? What have your experiences been?

I know that if I continue down this path I will through a single fixed odds spin of a roulette wheel see myself plunged quickly into financial ruin, I’m asking for your help and support in ensuring that I don’t do that to myself.

As a final side point, does anyone know about my gambling? No, to the point where when somebody asks me for any tips at work, my response is, as it is to all of us ‘don’t bet’.

[velvet]

Hello Rdemm and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[charles]

Hi Rdemm, well dome on looking for help.

My own opinion would be that if we were the sort of people who were able to show the control to “gradually lower our stakes” then we wouldn’t have a problem in the first place.

Read the otther stories here, you will see that you are not alone with this problem. You will also see the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?

I think you might already know the answer to one of your questions – having all your money in an easily accessible current account is the last thing you need. Too easy, too instant and, probably, too unaccountable access to funds with which to gamble.

Where could you put that money that was less accessible? Maybe a family member could help with accountability.

You don’t need your own money at work so don’t have any. Carry just enough for lunch, better yet take sandwiches. leave your cards at home as well and you can’t be tempted to gamble on your break or on the way home.

Use the support that you have available. You have found us, Gamcare is another option for you, as are GA meetings. If we could do it on our own then we wouldn’t be here.

Now your job. I know Compulsive Gamblers who work in the gambling industry who have now ben gamble free for some time. i also know Compulsive Gambers who work in the industry who have found this an impossibility with all the gambling that goes on around them. You will need ot be honest with yoursefl which of those two categories you fall in.

Keep posting and let us know the positive steps that you are taking.

[Author]

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