[kin]

[kin]

Dear all

I have read many posts recently and was inspired to start this new thread.
I hope this can be an invitation and a common thread for all who have gamble recently to come in to offer support and receive support.
More importantly, I hope it can be an intervention for someone who have a slip from developing into a relapse.

The extent of the damage caused by gambling will usually be determined by the SPEED by which one can STOP gambling again.

You are not alone!

Slips are when people gamble after a period of sobriety but stop again almost right away.
A slip can be the turning point in recovery because it indicates that we have been doing something wrong. We can learn from the incident and it may mean that our recovery will be stronger than ever before.
A relapse is far more serious than a slip because it means that the individual has returned to their gambling addiction.
It often starts off as a slip, but then progresses from there.
This relapse may last for days or it could be longer than this.

It may mean that the current attempt to escape gambling addiction has been abandoned completely.

A slip is a setback, but it doesn’t have to progress into a full-blown relapse.
It is understandable that people will feel guilty and a bit ashamed of their slip, but feeling this way can also be highly dangerous.
They may feel helpless, hopeless and convince themselves that all is lost and that their only option is to resume their gambling like before.
They may believe that since they have already gamble, there is no reason not to gamble some more.
They may promise themselves that they will stop tomorrow, but they will use the same justifications tomorrow. It is vital that they stop any further gambling right away.
This type of thinking is not only highly destructive, but it is also completely wrong.
It is vital that those who relapse understand that they can still build a successful life in recovery. The sooner they can stop again the better it will be for them.
The important thing is to look to the future. The time already spent in recovery will not be wasted so long as the individual can once again put a STOP to the gambling.
Perhaps THE REMINDER OF HOW BAD THINGS CAN BE IN GAMBLING addiction will mean that they are more motivated to stay sober in the future.

blessings

Kin

[theone12221]

Incredible insight kin. I’ve never really differentiated between a slip and a relapse before but you are spot on. Over a year ago I’d have full blown relapses. One loss snowballing into excuses/reasons to just keep escalating and losing more frequently and larger and larger amounts. Not only extremely damaging but these relapses are downright soul crushing and destroy our trust in ourselves.

More recently I’ve experienced slips. Isolated incidents where I’ve lost smaller amounts and did not continue chasing the day after. Also I managed to learn from these events and take positives from them (plus further self-excludions). I think sometimes we can get caught up with our mistakes but it’s important to look at the overall picture, our overall progress in the grand scheme of recovery. Perspective is pivotal to recovery.

[vera]

Good Thread, Kin.
Every time a “slip” happens, it involves choice. My choice and yours. I call “slips”, “gambling”. The same as I call a spade a spade! Using the “slip” word minimizes the act of gambling. . Every act has a consequence.
There is no such thing as a “minor gamble” for a CG because every time we indulge, we tend to whitewash the smaller monetary loss until the damage is done and we notice a couple of zeros added to that loss. Also, thinking of gambling in monetary terms only (which is common)overshadows more serious losses i.e pride, self esteem. dignity, relationships etc.
Every time a CG even dwells on the thought of “one more time” he/she is setting themselves up for further disaster. Because of it’s progressive nature, gambling for a CG will bring us eventually to the brink of disaster. What seems like a harmless picnic fire in a forest can often lead to a widespread inferno. The same applies to gambling. Unintentionally, we may very quickly lose control of what initially seems like a harmless act. Therefore, in recovery, we are “duty bound” to use our skills and tools to prevent catastrophe .
Yes, I agree we can learn from so called “slips” but learning how to deal with them BEFORE they happen i.e.”do things differently”, thus preventing further gambling should be a CG’s ultimate goal.
One day at a time.

[kcc123]

I agree with the Slips/Relapse category. However, I don’t think we should dwell or look too much in the future. Be present and make good choices now.

[theone12221]

Hey vera,

I completely agree with you there. Definitely the aim is to never touch gambling EVER again. I definitely think that relapses are almost impossible to avoid along the journey to recovery (and I will never use this as an excuse for gambling) and I think there is definitely an “improvement” in these relapses or “slips” as we progress through them. The mitigation of the damage done each time, the extent (money/time) of each relapse and the lessons we learn from each one. I think these go a long way towards our overall recovery.

But yes, the ultimate goal is to NEVER touch gambling ever and as I have advised many others on here, we should never play the victim card and use “relapses” as an EXCUSE to play. Don’t be disheartened by them but it is important we seem them as very dangerous (and potentially can spread into a wildfire very quickly) and thus must learn as much as we can from them and do whatever it takes to prevent those triggers/situations arising again in the future.

[Steven187]

With the slips/relapses theory. These are down to the individual tho. The severity in financial terms will vary from person to person.
Each persons recovery/journey is different, as are the circumstances that brought us all here.
There’s some good advice on these forums, but I think it’s worth noting that everyone is different. What works for one person, may not work for the next.

[kcc123]

I think what you said about journeys being different is spot on. We can all relate to each others struggles though. These forums help me realize we have a shared vice.

[Author]

Posts