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hi im john ,35 been gambling for around 10 years off n on , last 3 years on to the full !! , had counselling before at gamcare around 4 years ago, manage to stay away for gambling for 6 months then thought i could gamble reasonably time went on till i was gambling every day , most of the day, so 3 weeks ago got proper help again, stopped gambling, self excluded all my online accounts, went to face to face counselling , everything going well , felt great , until yesterday , the only access to gambling was through my phone, and what did i do , set uo another account , deposited at first 20 pounds , but was easily lost , so another 20 then another 20 , then 100 after several hours battling up and down i eventually lost 800 pounds , 800 pounds my parents gave me and my partner to help move house, i have an amazing family son and daughter, and really understanding parents, but ive messed it up again, i feel so guilty, angry with myself !! i have been under pressure recently with no work as i work as a plasterer and things have took a quiet spell , but theres no excuses for what i’ve done, feel so ashamed and sad , ive told my counsellor and my partner , mr partner is in despair !! my next step is to give my phone up, bank cards up and not have any access online at all !! i am more determined this time, i will beat this.
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Hi John and welcome.
It sounds like your partner will have heard all of this before. Show her by your actions that you man it this time. Do you need a phone for work? Maybe get a “brick” with no online access.
£800 is a lot of money for a compulsive gambler to have access to. Restricting access to gambling funds would be a good idea. Do your parents know about your gambling? Maybe they need to know that IF they give you money in the future then they should let your partner have it.
Harry is right about support, don’t rule out things you ahve tried before.
In fact if Gamcare and counselling helped you stay gamble free for 6 months then maybe try it again. The difference this time needs to be that you then need to use ongoing support to maintain recovery. If at the end of 6 months you are continuing to post here, you are maybe getting to GA meetings then you will be in a stronger position to stay stopped.
keep posting and let us know the positive steps you are taking.
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