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I am convinced that there must be some metabolic changes going in my brain when I am gambling because I seem to lose all control, all memory related to the value of money, all commonsense; everything that I have perfect control over when I am not at a casino. I do not spend money foolishly on shopping, clothing, luxuries etc.normally I am very conservative….except at the casino.
I love the experience of being away, having no one to answer to, no one to ask me for this or that, noone expecting anything of me! However, the cost of this stress-relief is only more stress since I only end up with that sick feeling when I am finally out of money, mine or others, that makes me wonder what has happened to me while I was gambling?
I think that there must be some type of medicine available for individuals with compulsive/obsessive disorders that can help control these types of impulses that just completly take over. It is truly a sickness of the mind for which self-control is not effective. I’m sure that there will be a flurry of people that will tell me that I am just looking for an excuse…..no, I’m looking for answers. Some people can quit smoking, cold turkey. Others take nicorete or some other kind of patch, others try hypnotherapy…..right now I’m looking for anything that can help me kick this terrible addiction that I love so much.
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