[franchescha]

I don’t quite know what to say or how to begin.
I have fears that I am a CG.  I haven’t lost it all *yet* but could see it happening given the wrong set of circumstances.  I use gambling as an escape from reality.
I have a progressive physical disease which keeps me down many days.  Other days, when I feel better, I often gamble. 
Where I live there are three Indian casinos within a 1/2 hr. drive from where I live.  All of them give you free money to gamble with, free hotel rooms, free food … free everything except the money you lost.
So I decided I needed to look into this further.  A woman I met at the casino confided in me and told me she had lost $10,000.00 in one month after two fairly good sized wins (one at $5,000.00; the other at $3,000.00).  She said she wanted to go to a GA meeting perhaps so I found out where there was a meeting and we went.
She asked a few questions at the meeting and after it was over, she wanted me to go to the casino with her and gamble.  I had no desire to go to the casino so I went home after taking her to Starbucks for a cup of coffee.  She had no money to pay for a cup of coffee with. 🙁
I live on a very limited income and I cannot afford to gamble so if I do go to the casino, I tend to not overdo it and I try to leave if I do hit something.  That happened the last week  in fact.  I won $300.00 and left and went into town and bought $300.00 worth of food/household goods and came home.
I have not gone back since.
My recent experience with the woman I mention above has given me a sick feeling in my stomach.  I do not want to end up like her and I could end up just like her, I realize this.
To make matters worse, a man I know from the casino called me up on the 29th of the month.  He is on SSI (a form of disaiblity here in the USA).  He said he needed $32.00 from me so he could take his kids to a movie.  I did not give him the $32.00, I told him to tell his children that he’d take them out to lunch of Friday when he’d have his own money to spend.  I know if I lend him money, I won’t get it back (been there/done that with this man in the past already).
So my question is, do I belong here?  I have a desire to stop gambling but as I stated, I have not lost everything *yet*. 
Any replies are really appreciated a lot.
Thank you friends.
 
 

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