[Joshb2929]

I am new to the site and needed to tell my story just to get it out there, feel to respond and someone please give advice on how to stop!!! I have been gambling since I was in college. My weakness is sports betting. While in college I lost so much that I had to take 30k out in college loans to pay back my debts. when I got my first job, I ended up buying a small house and staying away for a small time, then by the time I was about a year in, I started again and again lost everything including my 401k. I had to pack ham sandwiches to eat at lunch every day for a month because I couldn’t afford to go to lunch with co-workers. Fast forward a few years and I went back to grad school at night and had built up a little bit of savings. I fell back into gambling and again took more loans during my time in grad school to pay off my debts. I then got my first big break in my career and was promoted to be a full time commodities trader, where I had an opportunity to make a lot of money. I got a few very large bonuses and since the beginning I have lost probably about 800,000. I continued to gamble and lose and the bets just got larger and larger because I was making so much. Now I have credit card debt, loan debt, and my house is mortgaged 100%. I am lucky enough to have a good salary and can still live, but I have lost so much it’s hard to swallow. The way I would cope is by depositing more into online accounts and if I had money in them, I believed that I could come back and win everything back, which we all know can’t happen. I got to the point where I was only happy when gambling. That’s all I could be happy about. I need some advice on how to get happy and forget about all of this nonsense. I have a wife and a 1 year old and I just want to enjoy them and live my life. Does anyone have any advice??

[charles]

Hi Josh, well done on looking for help.

Read the other stories here, you will see that you are not alone wiht this problem. You will also see the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?

Does your wife know about your gambling? or that it is a problem? She could help you with finanacial barriers and accountability. What other barriers can you put in place?

It sounds like the previous times you ahve stopped you ahve done it on your own. This time you will be using support and can be stronger still. As well as posting here check out your local Gamblers Anonymous meeting. Also this time remember that it’s not just about stopping, it’s about staying stopped. Keep posting and using support to maintain your recovery as well.

Keep posting and check out the live groups we have here as well.

[Joshb2929]

Charles,

My wife knows everything. She came from nothing so our life is great for her. She supports me completely and we are in the process of closing all credit cards and letting her handle the finances. My issue is this Charles, and maybe you could give me some insight…… My entire life has been sports, I played college football, I golf, play basketball, Racketball, softball etc etc….. And I associate gambling with sports. I can’t even enjoy a sporting event without a bet on it. My family is obsessed with sports basically my whole life is sports and I have bet on them since I can remember. How do I solve this problem??? I know it’s not a simple answer but there has to be some insight out there!!! Thanks again for posting to help me, I need all the help I can get!!!!

[charles]

Ah, so the question is – are you a “sports fan” or are you a fan of gambling on sports?

I used to think I was a sports fan. Though sometimes I wouldn’t want my team to score unless it was a certain player scoring? Sometimes I would only want them to score a certain number of goals/points? I might want my team to concede? Sometimes i even wanted them to lose?!!

What sort of “fan” was I?

Now I would say that I am a sports fan, i want my team to score, I dont care which player scores and no amount of goals is too many. I never want them to concede a goal.

See the difference?

Whether you are a true sports fan or not is something only you can fid out for yourself. If at the moment though you can’t enjoy watchuing a game without gambling on it then don’t watch. Do’t look at the odds/spread for a game either. Don’t look at results even if all you are thinking is about what you would have bet on.

My life revolved around gambling as well, finding other things to fill time was hard.

Do your family know about your gambling problems? or that you ahve decided to stop gambling? It will be important moving forward that they don’t talka bout any of their own gambloing with you.

I hope those thougths helped, you are not alone in haing gamblign as a large part of your life, it is important to find non gambling activities to fill that void.

keep posting

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