[Kady1103]

Hi all

I am only new to this even though I know I have had a problem for a while now. I started gambling maybe 4 or 5 years ago. It started off with small bets from just €20 once or twice a week. Of course this was no problem financially however I started earning more money so gambled more. At the time I didn’t realise I had a problem as I went for months without playing (online blackjack) but over the last year I have had more money overdrawn on my account than I have had money in it. I have a 2 year old daughter and partner I have been with for 13 years we were trying to save for a mortgage but I have such a bad credit record I know this is not going to happen. The pressure this is causing for me and I feel like I am ready to snap once he mentions money he thinks we have saved but I know I have spent it. I can’t bring myself to tell my partner as I am pretty sure he will be way too annoyed and I am worried what will happen. I feel the last couple of days I really need to speak with him and my parents as the stress is becoming too much but I am so worried what will happen. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

[charles]

Hello Kady and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[charles]

Hi Kady, well done for looking for help.

You are not alone with this problem, read the other stories here and you will see a lot that you will relate to. You will also see the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?

There is no easy way to tell your partenr and your parents. What does make it easier though is not just to present the problem – you can also show them what you are going to do about it.

Reading the other stories here you will see how barriers can help, you can get yourself banned from your usual gambling sites and get a blocker for your PC/phone that will stop you finding other sites. Financial barriers also help, it sounds like you currently have easy access to the household funds, you can change that.

The most important advice I can give you is to use the support that you have available. If we could do it on our own then none of us would be here in the first place. Keep posting here, maybe check out your local Gamblers Anonymous meetings.

From what you say, sooner or later he is going to find out anyway so better you tell him. You can also show him the positive actions you are going to take. We also have a Friends and Family Forum that he might find useful.

Keep posting and you are always welcome in the groups we have here.

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