[kslcarlson]

My name is Karin. I have been battling my gambling addiction for over 10 years. I am a single mom with four children. I have two teenage boys and two small daughters, 1 and 2. I am also a small business owner and full time student. Over the past 5 or 6 years, my abusive relationship with my daughter’s father has escalated my addiction and left me in a place I never imagined I would be. I have lost almost everything and only seem to find myself deeper in this endless hole. I used my tuition grants and loans to gamble, I have won large sums of money, only to be lost right back. I have also recieved welfare benifits, and now am being investigated for fraud. I am terrified and feel as though there is no hope or salvation. I have been in numerous treatment programs, worked hard, only to return to gambling. We are about to be evicted, and homeless. If I am not eligible for help, I don’t know what we will do? My family and friends are distant and tired of the same cycles with the addiction process. The hatred and shame that is inside of me feels sometimes too much to bear. I love my children more than life and feel devistated that I continue to make choices to gamble and risk everything. I want freedom and a life without despair. I feel alone and fear now, I will spend time in jail. I have been working with a therapist for over a year now, she is helpful and seems to offer some hope. This time, I don’t have much of a fight or hope left. I have lost everything to my addiction. I don’t know how I will get back to a healthy balanced life. I am constantly reminded of my misteaks and poor choices.One day at a time.

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