- This topic has 6 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 7 months ago by buster1969.
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24 September 2018 at 4:00 am #46646buster1969Participant
I started seriously gambling when I was 21 and really went down the rabbit hole when I was 33. I spent 10 years in gambling hell losing almost every dollar I made and having zero control
over myself. I started with casino gambling then graduated to online casino gambing and when that became illegal there was a new brick and mortar casino close to my house. I mostly played poker
but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t spend many nights at blackjack tables and even a few days playing slots. I didn’t care for slots so they were easy to quit. After finally realizing that there was no
scenario in which I’d ever actually be able to win and walk away I finally got the guts to quit. It was November 25, 2013 that I self-excluded from the casino and I haven’t placed a bet since.
I have been through all of the urges and even taken an unsupervised trip to Las Vegas and still didn’t gamble. I actually left the city and did a Grand Canyon tour by helicoptor. This was only about
two years into my recovery but I realize that if I go back I’ll lose everything. So many good things have happened since I quit. I remember standing in the casino and thinking that I had four or five
hours to kill and wondering what to do. They I looked to the poker room to my left and the sea of blackjack tables right in front of me and for a half second I thought about gambling. But then I
immediately realized that if I sat down and played that I’d almost certainly miss my flight along with all of my money as well as running up a massive debt on a credit card.
I’ve been strong but sometimes I miss hearing from other compulsive gamblers.
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24 September 2018 at 10:33 am #46648AnonymousGuest
I think it’s great you still touch base with support, did you ever attend GA?
Just asking because I know when I was gambling it was always good to see somebody who had been gambling free for years, to inspire me and give hope to those that really wanted to change.
I havn’t been to a GA meeting for years myself, but just with you saying you miss hearing from compulsive gamblers I thought it an option for you.
The gambling world is still very much alive and reading the testimonies on here helps me to keep out of it.
5 years must have seemed impossible for you once upon a time, of course it’s only a case of one day at a time..
Well done for all those todays.
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24 September 2018 at 12:52 pm #46649buster1969Participant
I spent three years regularly going to GA. It was extremely helpful early on but it got a little stale. We rarely had new members and for some reason when we did I didn’t think they got the attention they deserved. I know not all meetings are the same but for the one closest to me that was the case.
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24 September 2018 at 7:12 pm #46650charlesModerator
Hi Buster, well done on your gamble free time.
Also well done on coming here now. I am glad GA helped you stop. I always think that if we need support to stop gambling then it is also important to use support to maintain recovery.
Maybe chgeck out that GA meetign again, it might have changed since you were last there. Use this site as well.
This forum is avaialble 24/7 but check out the support groups as well – the “Open Groups” are unmoderated but all the other types of group have a “facilitator” in them so there is always someone to talk to. Hopefully I will see you in one of them, soon.
Keep posting.
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25 September 2018 at 10:49 pm #46651kathrynParticipant
Congratulations on your gamble free time.
The forums here are great for keeping in touch, use them!
Im so happy to read of your life since you excluded. That has been a godsend for me also. In saying that, It doesn’t work for everyone so I feel very blessed its working for me.
Looking back, could you have imagined you would be where you are now? Something to be really proud of!
Hope to read more from you,
Love K xx -
25 September 2018 at 10:58 pm #46652finding_lauraParticipant
Congratulations on making that milestone. It’s a testament to the many one day at a times you have lived gamble free. I’m glad you stopped by to let others in on your success. It gives hope when others see someone who has managed to loosen that hold. I don’t know if it will ever let us go completely so always good to keep aware. Keep doing whatever it takes. It hasn’t changed. It still takes everything from you. I wish you much success. And an update from you in future is always good too. take care,
Laura -
28 September 2018 at 2:11 am #46653buster1969Participant
Thanks Laura.
Something else I’d like to share is that since I’ve quit gambling I’m living the life that I hoped I would when I was gambling. I’ve had my house remodeled, I’ve taken fancy vacations, I’ve bought luxury items I always dreamed about, I got a great job and make more than I ever thought I would and I don’t have to worry about having to pay my bills.
But more importantly I’ve learned to take care of myself from a health and a spiritual standpoint. I have much more time to dedicate to family and friends, I’m able to sleep and when I wake up I have real hope for the day.
Knowing that I’m one bet from losing everything keeps me from going back. Losing money is one thing but losing a life that makes me happy isn’t an option.
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