[stuckinarut]

Hi there,
I am going to stop all this! It all started out so innocently. I was bored seen an ad on TV for bingo and deposited a tenner. I never won but really enjoyed chatting away to everyone and I thought this is fun!! I soon forgot about it and then one day I had no money and I thought well I’ve got no hope anyway give it a go? so I did and won £400 I then progressed to more deals and then slots!! and got really excited! won 500 on a 50p spin won a few hundred here and there! and a year later I had blow allot of money. I told my partner and he was so annoyed but he forgave me(poor man) 🙁 I said I wouldn’t do it again but I did and blew allot. I even blew some of my friends money!! I never win big I know allot of my issues are boredom due to the fact. I have really isolated my self from people and now seem to have a fear of going out on my own which have been like this since before all this started and also I get addicted to most things easily. 🙁 and feeling like I have no point or propose in life hasn’t helped either! But I have a really good man, friend and family. I am sick of lying to them and trying to cover up everything and my partner feeling i’m trying to hurt him. I have big events coming up within the year and have no idea of how I am gonna have the money the mear thought just makes me feel like I wanna jump of a bridge which is selfish!! I cant believe it’s got to this and I am going to have to come clean again tonight which is making me feel so ill!
Well first step was writing this out
Going to download that program
and come clean. 🙁

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