[ndn_ronhoward]

Hi.  My name is Ron.  I live in Wyoming and I am a preschool teacher.  Today was kind of the last straw for me.  I spent my last $60 at the casino.  It was meant for Christmas presents for my daughter and wife.  I thought I could double or triple it and get them something decent, but I lost it all.  All is not lost, however.  I still have a payday coming up, but the fact remains that I feel like I betrayed my family over a measly $60.  Earlier this week it was $40 and last week it was $50.  Granted, I haven’t lost a fortune, but it is becoming a problem for me.  I’ve neglected a couple of bills with the intention of paying them off next payday…and the next…
I’ve gotten to the point that I leave my money at home, for the most part.  I give my paychecks to my wife for deposit and I’ve told her to only allow me a small amount of cash for the week.  Mostly, it works, but the frustrating part is, I take every opportunity to go to the casino and blow it.  It’s right on my way to work so it’s hard to not stop off for a few minutes and throw in $20 or 30.
I remember a time when I could go out there with only the amount of money I was willing to lose and be content that if I did, I wasn’t out a huge amount.  If I did win I could quit while I was ahead and leave heavier than when I got there.  Now, it has gotten out of control, I feel.
I am frustrated that I’ve lost so much money, despite it being a few dollars at a time.  I am frustrated that I can’t really afford to go out there as much as I have been.  I’ve told my wife that I need to stay out of there.  She agrees and she has been very understanding about it.  I feel like I am letting her, my daughter and myself down.
I know there are lots of people out there who are much worse off than I am.  I know that I have a lot to be thankful for at the moment, but my life could be so much better if I could just bring myself to stay the heck out of there!Do or do not; there is no try!

[Author]

Posts