If or when your mind drifts back to when you’ve won half your money back in the past, have a look at your current situation also. Then ask yourself how did those “wins” effect your life.
You’ve done well to stop and question yourself, and you’ve done well to get through these last couple of days without gambling too.
Full credit to you for standing tall against your addiction.
You are being very honest with yourself I think. You might win, yeah, but so what? Havn’t you had wins in the past?
You’re still here because you need help. Previous wins have never saved or fixed you, maybe just prolonged your gambling and postponed your recovery a little longer.
The money you’ve lost I reckon will still come back to haunt you until you can fully accept that its gone.
Well done on what you’ve achieved so far.