Tina, you little monkey!
Sadly what happened to you is the same as what happened to me, without requesting it, you have ended up with this horrible addiction.
I hope that the phone counselling can help you build up the courage that you do need to do this. I have chickened out of many similar situations, ( gambling over 35 years, I’ve unfortunately had my fair share of cock ups).
I’m pleased you had a great day together but that will make your confession a bit harder I think, and also, your partner might be a bit more disappointed that you could go out and enjoy the day with him with this going on the back ground.
I’m sorry for stating the obvious but because of your financial situation he will find out, you can’t keep it a secret forever. When you do tell him, I wouldn’t be surprised if he tells you you’ve acted like you just don’t care by having the great day out with this lurking in the background. Of course Tina you do so obviousley care for him. And it is so hard for us to tell the ones we love something that we THINK will shatter their illusions.
I emphasise “think” but you don’t know how he will react and neither does anyone else. This of course is quite dangerous, self esteem drops dramatically when we presume we know others will react in a negative way.
You are are not alone with problem, but this site and the whole recovery thing is newish to you. Take it from someone that’s been here a long time, and had seen many people in your predicament.
Sometimes the reaction you get when sharing with somebody who loves you can be quite the opposite of what you’re expecting. A lot of the time partners can be very very supportive. And I know that the more great days out you have between now and telling him could plant bigger doubts in his head as to your sincerity.
Tina I’m at work and got to rush, I have a little more I’d like to add but will be at least an hour before I can.
I hope this helps in some way, I will try to get the rest done when I get home.
Take care, what’s done is done.