Went to the bank today. Transferred $400 from my savings to our joint checking account. My way of paying my husband back for my gambling losses. I have been putting this off. I have nothing in savings now. I guess we all know why I wanted to keep that little stash for myself. I still owe him $300, which is about what my next paycheck will be. I only get paid once a month. My impatience to build up my savings with winnings in addition to what I was earning, was a huge trigger for me. There was only one reason I wanted my own savings. Actually, having my own savings is a huge trigger for me. I wanted my own money to gamble with. I am quite depressed about all of this, but I guess knowledge is power. I am not going to have my own savings anymore. It’s too much of a temptation…my husband has always been ok with me having my own savings in the past, as it used to help pay for family activities. When I started working in January, I thought I could save to help pay for some of the home improvements we have been working on. I almost had enough for a new couch. I have decided that instead of saving for anything, I will take my paychecks and use them directly to help pay off our credit card debt. The money I earn is not my money. It is our money. It may only be a small drop in the bucket, but at least from now on it will be dropped in the right bucket!
