Monica I never have called Jonny a liar.
I have said I don’t believe him. If I knew for certain, beyond doubt he was lying I would call him a liar. I ‘m not saying he has deliberately told lies with any ulterior motive in mind.
I have said I don’t believe him, that is my opinion. My opinion based on what he has wrote, and how I interprat that.
Why I think that is glaringly obvious to me. But not to anybody else apparently.
When Jonny was at crisis point prior to day 1 he said he was 20 000 in debt. He said it would take him 1-2 years to get out of this debt.
That debt was cleared on day175 of his recovery. It sounded suspicious to me.
Jonny claims I cannot add 2 + 2 and get 4. But I can work out that to repay 20 000 back in little under 6 months means repayments of approx. 3 300 a month.
This is what I could not understand. If he’s been able to pay it back at that rate how could he make such a gross miscalculation?
Over the course of our heated debates Jonny has shared he earns a six figure sum most years. So how could he estimate it would take 1 to 2 years to repay 20 000 of debt with such a big income?
I did ask him to explain this to me last night so as I could understand him. I do want to believe him.
He did try to explain but I still can’t understand. Last year, Jonny told me, he earned 85K the lowest he’s earned in 6 years.
I appreciate he had no savings, I appreciate he was on the sick, with his back at the time. However he knew he’d be back to work within a few months, and earning his money again.
After 20 years of compulsive gambling, and all the trimmings that can come with it Jonny said he calculates he’s lost 425K gambling. That is a shocking amount and about 4 times his current salary. But at least at the end of it the debt he had equates to about two months’ worth of his annual salary. It’s not nice and of course I can see where his disappointment and anger with himself on making that realisation comes from.
He is fortunate in the fact he hasn’t left himself in debt of many times his annual salary. Like a lot of CG’s have.Many would be pleased to finally come to their senses and leave gambling behind and be in debt of only a couple of months’ worth of salary.
You posted the other day that you had on occasion mis-calculated, your debts because you have so many, me too. It’s easy done.
Jonny hadn’t miscalculated his debt though, I’m afraid I can’t believe a clever bloke, such as he is, would make such a mis-calculation.
This is the main thing I have said I don’t believe.
If Jonny wants to post the chat transcript in the forum that’s his call. I never tried to belittle him in any way, shape, or form. And we spoke for a lot more than a few minutes, another lie. If either of us is intentionally trying to belittle the other it aint me.
You ask why I felt the need to attack Jonny the way I did.
Because you’re asking I’ll answer but I don’t want to respond to Jonnys questions my replies will be similar to previous ones, and I think we’ll just end up going round in circles..
If you’ve read the posts on my thread Monica you will see a week before he suggested to 3raser she invest in stocks and shares, I posted to him that I thought he’d written one of the most sensible posts I’ve ever read on this site.
Go and read the post on his other thread. Brilliant makes sense.
When he suggested to 3raser about the stocks and shares I took exception to that. I don’t think anybody will convince me stocks and shares, even those in low yield, low risk diverse portfolios, is not gambling. Ask Velvet how many people she’s encountered over the years that lives have been ruined because their loved ones dabbled in “safe” stocks and shares.
I found it quite crass for him to suggest replacing one form of gambling with another. Tantamount to me saying to an alcoholic, “Stop drinking whisky here have this wine” or saying to you, “Monica those slots have ruined you why not just have £2 footy bets”
That’s what lead to me posting a strongly worded comment on his thread, the first time. He couldn’t understand my point of view or didn’t understand it, and responded quite harshly. I should have walked away then, I wish I had.
Then recently he posted on Tina’s thread that he wasn’t sure why she should tell her partner, if she could manage to quit gambling and repay her 60 000 debt off without her partner’s knowledge.
Two bad things about posting that. If Tina had been posing the question “should I tell my partner” I could understand him expressing his view. She was already cock sure she was going to tell her partner though, I’m worried that in her situation at the minute his thoughtless comment has put doubt in her mind about telling her partner. With the exception of Jonny every single person who has posted to Tina has supported and encouraged her to help her make this big step. Most of us have had to do it, it’s a very hard thing to do. For many, I would think the majority it has been the first major step to a life in recovery.
Also if Jonny was so worried and angry at the start of his journey, and figured it would take him up to two years to repay his 20 000 debt on his six figure salary. How could he possibly imagine anyone could pay 60 000 of debt off hiding the fact from their partner?
Just for the record Monica I havn’t trawled through Jonnys posts looking for things to pick faults with him. I read his journals start to finish all because of the post about the stocks and shares.
I am going to do my best to avoid Jonny, this situation is not a healthy one. I’ve answered this to you because you asked me two genuine questions.
Suffice to say I stand by everything I’ve said.