Thanks for your reply, Sad. I thought I would post a little update this morning. I am doing well. I did gamble in September and October, but I am pledging not to gamble in November. I have managed to pay my brother $500 each month since August to pay back the money we owe him. I don’t think I gambled this summer, which is amazing, because summers have always been bad for me. Always losing lots of money.
Summer was crazy. Starting a new job. We sold our cottage. So, we worked every weekend moving. Also, our trailer flooded. So much damage. We gutted it and started over. We had a contractor, but we did a lot of the work ourselves. Our contractor did terrible work. So disappointing. The floors still aren’t right. Uneven and still soft in spots. It still makes me so mad. But, in general, it looks a lot better than it did before the flood, and our insurance covered a lot of it. Lots of stress though on my husband and I, with the trailer and also losing the cottage. It took its toll on our relationship. But, now, I think we are better than ever. We are both in a very good place, and we are enjoying ourselves and our time together. Kind of like when we were young, before we had kids. Both of us working, and then enjoying our evenings together. Except now we have less money and less future to look forward to. We do eat better though, so there is that. lol
My job was so hard in the beginning. I would come home crying saying I couldn’t do it. It’s still difficult, but I really like the people I work with and my office is brand new, and the University is beautiful and now I even like the fact that the job is challenging.
It’s been great having my son and DIL home from London. They lived with us for a while, but now they are in a lovely house close by. My daughter is also doing well. She started a new job the exact same day as I did. We are huge football fans, so we see the kids every weekend there is a home game. We all really get into all the hoopla!
So, I can’t complain. Life is good. It may not sound like it, but I think recovery is going well, also. The last two trips to the casino in September and October have set me back spiritually and financially, but I am trying not to dwell on it and to live and learn from it and to move on. What else can we do? Recovery is a life-long process. What I am finally beginning to learn is to accept myself for who I am, and I may even be beginning to like myself. I am learning to give myself a break, and as I am getting better at it, I have noticed I that I am able to accept others for who they are and give them a break also. Everyone has their own ### and we are all really doing the best we can from where we are at.
That’s about it for now. Take care every one. Be gentle with yourselves.
