so, it has been 345 days now, 20 days until i reach my year mark, WOW. i have no doubt that i will get this hurdle out of the way with.
It hasn’t been plain sailing and there is times when it creeps into my thoughts unexpected and relapse is only 1 bet away so i take nothing for granted but over time, as you start to heal, you also start to build a new and better life, something to hold onto, it takes time but i see hope where once there was none. This time next year all my gambling debts will be paid off ( a quarter of my wage goes towards this).
i still work with my Therapist and rarely work on gambling anymore, more so the root causes that were behind gambling. For me, this has been the pivotal support i needed to free myself.
It hasn’t been easy by any means but it does get easier and problems that where entwined with gambling either get resolved or left in the past.
i was out with the dog the other day and climbing this steep hill, it was windy and drizzling and i thought “oh i can’t do this, it’s too difficult” and i was about to turn around when i thought “just give it a go” a turned my music up and focused on a small spot in front of me and when i reached that point, i focused on another spot just in front of me and before i new it i was at the top and pretty happy with myself.
i thought afterwards that this is exactly the same with gambling, we look to the top of the hill and it seems too daunting, too difficult and definitely too far away so we give up and go to we know, hustling everyday to try and survive.
if we just focus on the first small goal/step, reach that point and set the next goal/step in small achievable steps then our journeys may not seem so impossible.
i just wanted to drop by and give an update 🙂
