Seri, you are keeping your options open perhaps ? While you still have an avenue to gamble , there is always a chance that you will get the big win and everything will be all right. You will make gifts to family and friends and life will be sorted
When you self exude from everywhere Seri and make all your barriers at high as possible , that fantasy is gone .. Now Its down to you !
You have to a manage your money and build the life you want.
The big win is no longer there to bail you out.
It’s sometimes not gambling that’s hard to let go of .. It’s the realisation that the fantasy is gone..
The big win even if it materialised would be gambled away.
We have all been on the journey long enough to realise this..
Let go of the dream, the fantasy Seri .. Give it a year … It will sill be there and see how your life looks in a years time.
So 1st feb next year ….