Hi Bettie, I know that you’ve heard it all before about your emotionally unavailable "friend" and many times also. He even told you himself, he does not want a relationship, even though at time he sends you a different message. Him telling you that he doesn’t want a relationship allows him to justify his actions towards you. What about if you developed a friendship with a man you met at GA that have some success under his belt staying gamble free. You could work on recovery together. Also they say that 1 in 5 relationships develop online these days and there are several of these sites. If you choose to go this route, take lots of time to get to know the person online. That way you’ll see any red flags that may come up. Don’t ignore these as we tend to attract dysfunctional men that need fixing. Diamonds in the rough we think. Don’t settle Bettie; you deserve a healthy relationship that with a man that is available emotionally, willling to support you, encourage you, and build you up, not tear you down. This "friend" of yours goes for the jugular everytime as he knows your emotional weaknesses. Do the pros and cons of your relationship with him. As soon as you start to pull away from this person, if you allow him, he will just reel you in again by some kindness, thus starting the cycle again. It’s the cycle of physical/emotional/psychological abuse that many women live with every day. Again, Bettie, I say these things with love as I want you to be happy. Carole
