Hi Guys,
Oh you are all so right and I know your hearts are in the right place. I don’t know that I deserve better. I try to tell myself I do but since it’s always been like this it is hard to convince myself of that. I have gotten the best and most wonderful advice from you all. Heck even this "friend" had told me that there are lots of guys interested. My question is really? Where are they, introduce me to some of them. Nothing. No response. ( Maybe he’s afraid I will find a Real Man to spend my time with, guess he really wouldn’t want that would he?) Oh and the weight crack! Timing just perfect! I’ve been working out and not getting the results I wanted. Not encouraging or supportive in the least!
Oh well, it is what it is. I’m not ready really. I have so much work to do on myself and really, how could I expect to make someone else happy when I have such poor sense of self? Nothing worse than a clingy insecure person around all the time. I look back to how I was with this "friend" when we first met. I think he told me 3 different times in the first month that he didn’t want a relationship. But boy, he never acted that way. If he didn’t want me he surly had a funny way of showing it.
So I made it to my brothers ( my mother made a pain pill donation, God bless her) and my niece was a no show. I wondered why. My sister came later after work and I asked her what was going on. She said she has to wait for temporary state health care to kick in for my niece, since my brother in law lost his job again so they have not been to counseling. Social services still have not contacted my sister and nothing had happened yet to the abuser. My sister said my niece is embarrassed because she knows I know and she is afraid. I felt so bad. I told her to let her know I would not bring it up and no one else would either. We are here for her. If she wants to talk then we will talk about it.
Took a pain pill and a muscle relaxant. If I don’t sleep tonight I don’t know what else to try, but I am confident I’ll sleep as I am barely keeping myself awake right now.
Thanks again!
peace
bettie
