So i made sports betting each day, on all sports later and i used more and more time to find real games that will help me to make profit and earn money , and also i started to invest more and more. But i was never sucessfull. There was a lot of problems and unlucky moments and i was always so close to reach a sucess, but it never happened. Around 2008 , it means 10 years ago i started to take credits from banks. Since i didnt had any doubts before and since i have a good job, it was always very easy to take credits from banks. I was always thinking that i will finally find a way to beat a online bookmakers, but i started only to lose more and more and addiction rised extremly. Nothing worked for me and real hell came when i made full focus on live betting where i started to lose huge amounts on short time. After that, it means in last 8-10 years, my almost each day is same, gambling, betting, losing, depression, new credits, debts, and this was clear way to hell… No one knew my gsmblings problems and couldnt saw it. Its not easy because i received mobey directly from banks and made sporrs betting online. My wife knew one part of this story but she could not know how seriously is rhis actually. I was abd i am still very good to lie, to hide real story, to finf money for bettibg and of course to lose it.. Finalky 2 years ago i recognisex that i am sick of this, that i am addict and that i need real help to try to stopp with this. But at that moment i couldnt stop. My debts was so high that i couldnt say that to my wife. I was still made betting but since that moment i clearly saw that i am adfict and that all this will finish bad.. Finally, at the start of this year, 2018, i came in situation that i coukdnt take new debts. Forgot to say that in last 2-3 years i was taking new debts mainly to pay old debts, it is bagigal circle… when i really didnt had any solution or way back, i decided to say all to my wife, to stop with gambling and to visit institutions to get profffessional help to stop with betting…
My wife decided to help me and she was, and still is a great support. we found one way to pay back all debts in long term. I started with treatment at one psychologist and stoped with betting and thinking about it. After many years i was finally happy in my life again. it was like i was born again. I had so much free time each day that i couldt know what to do and how to use all this time. But i used it on my family, my wife and kids.
everything was like a dream, until one day at the ebd of march. I was out of gambling almost three months. and one day i received email from one of my ex online bookmakers with really fantastic offer. First i closed all it, but after three days i saw it, i contacted them and was another huge error in my life, i made deposit to make spirts betting again. Really dont know what i was thinking in that moment. But all story started again. Betting each day and started to lose again. I was doing it in one month and finally i just said it to my psychologist to see and learn his reaction.Need to admit that after all i was not so satisfied with treatman i received there. I was expected much more help and more proffessional altitude.
In sonner, around July, my wife finally noticed abd realized that i started again. She was shocked this time more then she was in January. I started to lie and promised that i will stop immidiatly and that i have all under ny control.
But not, i dont have. I have now new debts again and new old problems again. Also again i dont have any solution and there is no way back. I need to admit to her all again but dont know her reaction this time. Easyly i can lose all i have after that. I want to stop again. i want to chsnge my life again. i know i am sick, i am addict, i am loser, i am bad man, i am really bad…