Let it go, Mav. We all know how you feel. From your earlier post it looks like you have been thinking a lot about your finances and not being out of debt till you are 75. For me, thinking about our lack of money is a huge trigger. Thinking about money in general, and especially thinking and worrying we don’t have enough. That is why I try very hard to focus on recovery and to not think about the money or debt part of it. Especially after we have just gambled. Which I know is very difficult to do. I have recently accumulated a gambling debt myself, which I just hate having. It makes me so mad at myself. But there isn’t anything I can do about it today. Eventually, yes, but not today. So, I try to focus on what I can control and do today. In other words, live today the best I can. The important thing is to not continue to gamble. To not make things worse than they already are. You are a smart man, Mav. Giving in to addiction can never work. But, if you stay away from it long enough, solutions will come…ideas will flow. There are ways to earn extra money, ways to improve our lives, and we like everyone else, have the power to do so. But, the truth is, we won’t if we continue to look for the one solution that doesn’t work, and which got us in trouble in the first place.
I know you are hurting, but try to be easy on yourself. Just for today. Then do the same thing tomorrow. Things will get better, Mav. I know they will.
