Sorry to hear you are down in the dumps, Jon. It never rains but it pours.
It’s almost 7am here so just a few quick thoughts.
First, you are not a failure just a CG who didn’t ask for the “bug”. Failures don’t seek recovery, they quit trying!
Was your accident an Occupational Injury/Accident? Was everything documented/witnessed and did you go to ER immediately, and get copies of medical reports? Countries differ with rules and regulations but keep a clear weed free head on you shoulders and look at making a Personal Injury Claim. Where I live you would be covered by insurance if you have an accident in the workplace or in a public area.
3. Are you insured to work with an injury and so soon post surgery? Where I live that would mean a breach of Health and Safety regulations. An employer would be deemed negligent to allow staff to work in an unfit state.
Gotta fly now Jon…Look into this more carefully. Get legal advice before you do further damage to your back. Sounds as if you are blaming yourself and too quick to return to work.
Make your health your priority. Don’t jump the gun.
Gambling and weed will solve nothing.
Stay focused.
