I’ve won a lot of money. My problem is that I’ve lost a lot more back. I’ve also lost my life in turn. I hate myself daily. Questions my confidence. Compare myself to others and usually realize I think that they’re better than me for some reason. I see a nice car drive by and say to myself…. “I hate myself for not having that car. Why did I make so many mistakes!” But does that really help me? I don’t think so. I know I just need to focus on one day at a time. From the time I get up in the morning to the time I go to bed. I will not gamble for this one freaking day. Now I’m trying to think of three to five things I’m blessed and grateful for in the morning and I’m starting to feel a little better. I’m also stretching a little everyday getting ready for this back surgery I have coming. I’m going to beat gambling, this bad back, debt, and all the crap that I’ve let build up that has brought me to this point. Game on!
