I woke up feeling the same as I’ve felt since this has all began. A complete useless fool, every day is a struggle just to get to the end so I can crawl into my bed and wait until the next day of work.
I use to love my job but now I don’t like anything and it’s made me a selfish, angry, bitter, and impatient person. And I know there is no one to blame but myself.
A small voice in my head comes out when I drink wanting to die but now its constant after I’ve wasted my savings in such a stupid way.
I can’t think or focus all I think about day and night is what a fool I am. I’m 28 years old, it’s summer, I (was) a good looking guy but I feel like my body is slowly shutting down. My life will never be the same and I can’t handle another 20 years feeling this way, underperforming in every aspect of my life and having no joy or happiness.
I can’t believe this is how my story is going to end, I HAD EVERYTHING and threw it all a way.
It’s not just the money, I had money, it’s my confidence and self respect and who I was as a person.
Now all those close to me know about my problem and I can’t handle to know what they must think.
This was the worst mistake of my life it has ruined everything that I use to enjoy.
