Hi Tina
I agree with Laura. I’ve always found that telling my mother was the thing that stopped me carrying on. She’s been through the mill with me,
I think telling your partner is a must for your ongoing recovery, if it turns out he has something to tell you, your honesty and courage in telling him of your situation would probably encourage him to fess up if he has any secrets for you.
Your relationship would not be true, and would in all honesty, probably fail if you tried to live a lie. (Either of you). The healthiest relationships have love truth and honesty as their core.
Secrets are dangerous in any relationship, and a CG with secrets is a ticking time bomb, in my opinion.
When I went through the GMA rehab programme it was 9 months long, in fact I was there 10 months. The first six of those months were spent really getting you ready for counselling. I feel I was one of the lucky ones, the programme has changed since. But my mind was ready for the counselling, I learnt a lot about the importance of talking, and listening. As opposed to just speaking and hearing.
I think sometimes, especially after I first left, I was too honest, by that I mean I shared maybe too much. I still do go overboard with too much information these days on occasion. However my real life has improved by an immeasurable amount because of my ability to talk about how I feel emotionally. Lots of men do struggle with this though.
Well hope that wasn’t too much irrelevant gobbledegook for you. It’s still Friday here 10.40pm I start work at 2am…you must be 12 hrs ahead from us then.
There was one of the GT advisors moved to NZ a few years ago, don’t know if she still has ties with GT but she was a great counsellor, be a mad coincidence if that’s who you got to speak to on your phone counselling. She was intending to stay in the same line of work I recall.
Take care Tina.
Ps the reason the prompted me to post was to say if you did decide to tell your family, as well as just telling them you gambled again and put yourself in the mire. Tell them also that you’re already taken steps to help yourself. Your over 4 weeks since you gambled its different in their eyes to you turning up when you’ve just been gambling and you’re in a state of panic and despair. You’re already taking positive steps, they will be proud of you. You should be proud of you for standing up and facing this thing!