I am sorry to here you went back. I try to look at the positives.. You know what you have done wrong, and you are trying to make it right. It was a momentary lapse of reason, and not a lifetime sentence. Get yourself back to the right frame of mind, and know that you learned a valuable lesson. For me, it is important not to beat myself up too much, because the more I despise what I have done, the more that I begin to not care, which leads me astray. The fact you are back online shows you care, and you want to do the right things for yourself.
Best wishes, and I hope my words help a little!
Johnny B