Hi Rs,
Well done on sharing how you feel, thats a massive step in the right direction, I understand how you feel and can relate to many things you share, all I can say to you is “there is hope” and I can promise you that.
I have been fighting this addiction for many years and have lost more than I could possibly share but I still have my wife and kids that alone is pricless………..you can change like I know I can we just have to work hard at it, keep fighting and please keep sharing, stay strong and start getting some barriers in place, hope to hear an update from you soon and browes around this site, there are very many helpful people and features around.
I hope this finds you well and wish you and your wife all the very best, take care and speak soon.
Maverick