Where you are with gambling is exactly where I was so I recognise it well. We stop, we start, we stop and so it goes on until we reach a point of no return where I did. It is the addiction deeply engrained that seeks to destroy us, and we cooperate with it because deep.down we are very sad at how life has panned out. We seek oblivion and maybe we hope we won’t wake up which sometimes feels
preferable to life But we do wake up and the more we relapse and dig the hole the worse our physical and mental health get. That is the pattern and in recovery we need to confront those issues and find a reason to go on. Like me, we both have many reasons to go on. Our families love us even if the relationships are not exactly ideal. Five and a half years I too was lost in this addiction reacting to loss in my life and wanting to throw everything including myself away cos I had had enough of a less than great life.
You have value Liz, you are worth it. I have value and am worth it.
You can recover from this and I hope the air conditioning gets sorted out very soon. It has been boiling in the U.K. now for months but finally it is getting a little cooler.
