Hi K
When you have kicked this addiction into touch, you will know who your real friends are. Along with recovery, I believe, comes real empathy; you will see other peoples problems and you will be able to understand them better – you can be a true friend to those who are struggling. For me, this is one of the bigger perks of recovery, to see things in others that were not visible before.
We cannot all afford go to casinos and restaurants, so dont embarrassed about the situation you are in; be honest with your friends who may be a lot more understanding than you give them credit for.
You will buy a car K and you hopefully will meet someone really special for you whoever she is, she will appreciate the gamble-free man who has faced his demons; the man who understands what it is like to feel confused, frightened and embarrassed; the man ‘you’ want to be and the man I know you can be.
True, lasting recoveries do start and they start with just one day – you have done fifteen and they do mean a lot, they are a launching pad for one of the greatest things you will ever do. Relapses are not inevitable, if they were, I wouldnt be writing to you now.
Another version of the Serenity Prayer that you may like:-
God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the thing that I can
And Wisdom to know it is me.
I wish you well.
Velvet