Hi Cairo
Well done writing your first post, I am sure it was very painful to write.
Sometimes anger, disappointment, confusion and shame can lead us to feelings of hate but I have to ask you why you wrote this post if it was not because your first hope would be that you could rekindle love if your husband faced his addiction and stopped gambling.
Your husband lies in a desperate attempt to divert you from his addiction but of course if doesn’t work; he doesn’t appear to know, however, what else to do. Has he ever tried GA (gambler anonymous) or spoken to a counsellor about his problem – has he ever sought any help of any kind or are you his only sounding block?
There is a brilliant post somewhere on the site and I must find it again for you, where a compulsive gambler who lives in control of his addiction explains why support is so necessary for an addicted gambler – if it was possible to ‘do it alone’ and stop gambling, sites like this and GA would not exist.
If you want to tell his family in anger then I would not say that I thought it was the right thing to do. Families can live in a state of denial over a child or sibling with the addiction to gamble and an angry approach could damage your relationship with them. If, however, you want them to support you and you do care deep down that he is unhappy with his addiction and needs support, then I would think it was a good thing to include them.
I am going to leave this here Cairo as I have to go out but I will come back to you asap. I wanted to get some thoughts off to you quickly so that you know you are being heard and that I do care.
Look after yourself
Velvet
