Hi Trucker. Welcome to the forum. You are not the first spiritual person to fall down the gambling rabbit hole, I did too and it took a spiritual solution to come out of it and Into recovery. I had lost hope but found it again. My relationship with my higher power or God has changed radically. I,knew him not before. The same gambling stories, nearly lost my home but did lose my business. Gambling is a progressive illness, it will get worse and worse and we fall down even further until we are on the street, insane, health problems or worse.
Look at your life, is it a happy and fulfilled one through gambling? Are you powerless over gambling and has your life become unmanageable? Do you believe that a higher power can bring you back to sanity? Compulsive gamblers never win and harmless fun becomes funless harm.
Get to GA, admit those two things to yourself. But you have to,really,want to stop. Most of us go so far down before we stop and want to close that door for good. Tellyour wife and ask for help if possible in managing your finances? The depression comes from the gambling and it’s effects.
There is always hope. I thought there wasn’t any for me. I was destitute, depressed and sick for 9 months when I stopped. I did t want to get,out of bed and often didnt. But I did come out of it with a stronger belief in God and wiser, as a result. You can too but you must really want to.
